Good Dreams
by iloveyoucalzona
Summary: The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again. When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. Set post Season 11.
1. Chapter 1

**Summary:**

 **The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again.**

 **When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. When people are in pain, they sometimes go directly to the source of what hurt them, hoping that this time will be different.**

 **Hoping that they'll be stronger. Better. Smarter. Kinder.**

 **Better equipped to work through the pain and to be happy.**

 **Stronger to prevent the next injury.**

 **Sometimes, it's only wishful thinking.**

 **And, other times,** **it works.**

* * *

 **Set post S11/early S12.**

* * *

"I dreamt about you last night."

Callie looked up from her iPad into clear blue eyes, staring intensely at her. She knit her eyebrows together. "What?"

Arizona smiled enigmatically. "I had a dream about you," she repeated. "That's all."

Callie looked at her in confusion. "Okay...?"

Again, Arizona's facial expression was unreadable—as was her response. "I just thought you should know." She smiled, emanating actual, physical sunshine, then moved to walk away. "I'll see you in the meeting."

Callie's eyes followed her ex-wife as she walked away. What the hell had just happened?

* * *

"KAREV!" Callie called down the hall towards the Pediatrics fellow.

Alex looked up, already scowling at her. "Why are you always yelling at me?"

Callie quickly strode up to him. "What's going on with Arizona?"

Alex raised his eyebrows. "How the hell should I know? Ask her yourself."

Callie sighed. "She's being weird. Like, she's perky. And friendly. Towards me."

Alex waited.

"Do you know why?"

He made a face. "Maybe she wants to be your friend? I've gotta work," he insisted. "Talk to _her_ if you want to know."

Callie pouted. " _Fine_. It's just weird, that's all! Isn't it weird?"

Alex shrugged, walking the opposite direction. "It's not like she talks to me about you. Figure it out."

Callie huffed, unmoving. She knew that Arizona's behavior—though odd—shouldn't affect her so much, yet she was intrigued. Really, really intrigued. And she wanted to know what brought the blonde to make a point of seeking her out to freakin' say, "I dreamt about you." Who did that? Seriously? Especially to an ex.

Whatever. Really, it wasn't worth worrying about. Arizona was...in the past.

And Callie was...happy. She'd found a woman who made her happy. Part of her never expected to find someone, again, but well...she had.

She'd met a woman who was drama-free and didn't resent her for things outside of her control.

She was happy. And she wasn't going to let her ex-wife change that.

* * *

As Callie and Meredith arrived at the meeting where surgical attendings, fellows, and chiefs of departments were gathered, Callie noted Arizona herself, already sitting down at the crowded table and pointing at the one empty seat left there: one that was coincidentally right beside her.

Had Arizona saved her a seat?

That was weird. More than weird. After two and a half years of barely being cordial and only ever talking about Sofia and the weather, Arizona's sudden obvious interest in her was suspicious. What was it about that day that had Arizona making an effort to...what? Be her friend?

Carefully, Callie sat down beside the blonde.

"I saved you a seat," Arizona explained.

"Thanks."

Arizona dimpled. "How was your morning?"

Before Callie could answer, Dr. Webber bellowed, "Alright, listen up folks."

The room immediately quieted.

"As many of you know, the Board, the Harper Avery Foundation, and I are currently looking for a new Chief of Surgery. I would like to encourage any of you who may feel _prepared_ and interested to consider running for this position. Note that there will also be outside applicants, so it may be competitive. Make sure to plan your proposal with that in mind. Are there any questions?"

Bailey eagerly raised her hand.

"Dr. Bailey, go ahead."

Bailey smiled. "These 'outside applicants.' What might they have that we—the strapping, brilliant, eager, innovative doctors of Grey Sloan— don't?"

Everyone laughed.

Webber eyed the overconfident woman. "I can't tell you that yet, but if you're interested, you should get used to the idea that you are lacking in at least one area where they are not."

That immediately shut everyone up.

"Yes, sir. I will," Bailey nodded.

"Good," he quipped. "Any further questions?"

No one made a move to raise their hands.

"Then, you're all free to go," the patriarch of the hospital concluded.

And everyone was on their way. That is, everyone but Callie and Arizona.

Callie was determined to get to the bottom of Arizona's strange behavior before she left the conference room, and Arizona felt glued in place by Callie's suspicious stare.

"Well," Arizona chirped, ready to get out of there. "See you later?"

"Wait," Callie put up her hand, stopping Arizona without actually laying a hand on her.

Arizona gulped, sitting back down. "Yeah?"

"What is this?" Callie asked bravely. Did she really want to know?

"What?" Arizona asked innocently, but her eyes were shifty.

Callie crossed her arms. "You know what."

Arizona sighed. "I just...I heard you're dating someone, and—"

Callie groaned. The last time Arizona had found out about who she was seeing, it hadn't ended so well. "What, did you date this one, too?"

Arizona smiled patiently. "No, Calliope. I don't even know who she is."

"Why, then?" Callie asked impatiently.

Arizona exhaled a deep breath, trying to remain patient and keep herself from admitting anything she wasn't ready to. "I just...wanted to make sure you knew that I'm happy that you've found someone who makes you happy. Thrilled, really," she plastered a smile on her face that wasn't entirely convincing. "I'm just trying to be a good," she cleared her throat, hating the term, "ex-wife here."

Callie widened her eyes. This admission was unexpected, to say the least. She didn't think she and Arizona could ever be just friends, but here the blonde was, trying. "Thank you," Callie smiled genuinely. "For...being happy for me."

Arizona cocked her head. "Sure. And we should have dinner or something soon. With Sofia, of course," she quickly added. "To catch up."

Callie nodded slowly, weighing the request. Something still felt...weird. But she had missed Arizona. Really, really missed her, just as a person. Because, while she thought Arizona had been the love of her life, the blonde had also been her best friend for a long time. And not being able to be even friends anymore had been hard. So she was glad that they were finally in a place where they could be there for each other, with no hard feelings.

That was what Arizona was saying, right?

"Yeah. You should come to the house sometime. Sof would love it." _So would I_ , she thought, but she silenced the notion, burying it deep inside herself.

Arizona grinned. "So would I."

* * *

A few days later, Callie was picking up the house when she got a call on her cell phone. She smiled, picking it up. "Hey, there."

"Hey, stranger."

Callie loved how easy everything was with this woman. Different from how it's been with Arizona—particularly during those last few years. "How's it going?"

"Good," the woman replied. "It would be better if you'd come have dinner with me tonight, though," she flirted.

Callie winced. "I wish I could, but I actually invited my ex over for dinner, tonight."

"Your ex?" the woman intoned.

"Yeah. Just to catch up and make Sofia happy, you know?" Callie explained.

"Sure," she quickly conceded. "We've been together for a few months, now. I trust that you like me."

"Good, because I do," Callie smiled.

"Good. So have fun tonight, and I'll see you this weekend hopefully?"

" _Yes_ ," Callie agreed immediately. "See you then. Bye."

When Callie hung up, she sighed. Had it really been a good idea to invite Arizona over for dinner? At _their_ old home? In retrospect, probably not, but there was nothing she could do about it then. She could only emotionally prepare herself for the potential onslaught of pain and awkwardness.

* * *

Callie had told Arizona to come by at seven, but of course, she got there ten minutes early. Her parents had taught her the importance of timeliness and manners and, well, they'd seemed to stick with her.

Gingerly, she rang the doorbell, trying to ignore the strange nervousness she felt in the pit of her stomach. Dinner had been her idea, after all, and if anything got awkward, Sofia would be there as a safe buffer.

And, she had to admit, she was thankful that Callie even agreed to see her socially. So much had happened, but Arizona had finally gotten the space to heal and discover what she wanted during the last two and a half years.

She was healed. She had accepted her disability, and she had forgiven Callie.

She had forgiven the woman who—as it turned out—had loved her more than she ever could have imagined, and, well, Arizona wanted her back.

She wanted Callie to forgive her, too.

She knew the odds weren't in her favor, though, so she was settling for...a sort of friendship. That was better than nothing, right?

If Callie was happy with the new woman she was dating, then she deserved to be happy.

Arizona had made her unhappy for long enough.

Finally, the door swung open, but instead of an excited Sofia welcoming her, there was only Callie.

"Hi," Callie smiled sheepishly.

"Hi," Arizona replied, eyeing her ex-wife. "Sofia?"

Callie rolled her eyes slightly, opening the door wider. "Come in."

Carefully, Arizona strode in, immediately taking in the entry-room and living room, looking for any changes.

It looked almost the same as it had when she'd lived there, and she found that to be a relief.

"So, bad news," Callie explained.

Arizona raised her eyebrows.

Callie winced. "I may have forgotten that I agreed to let Sof sleepover at Aleka's tonight. And I tried to cancel, but..."

"Puppy dog eyes," Arizona finished, understanding.

"Yeah!" Callie laughed. "She got that from you, you know. And I have no problem being bad cop when I have to be, but..." she shrugged helplessly, and Arizona smiled.

"It's okay. I get her this weekend, anyway."

"Right," Callie smiled back. God, she was nervous. She knew she shouldn't be. After all, they were over. So over. But, still, having Arizona so close was...dizzying.

Which was stupid, she knew, but she couldn't help but feel a little...dizzy in her presence. There was no other way to describe it.

"So, dinner? With just the two of us?" Arizona asked.

"Yes!" Callie exclaimed, as if suddenly remembering. "But, honestly, I don't really feel like cooking."

Arizona waved her off. "Callie, you don't have to cook for me. I practically invited myself, as is. We could just order in some Chinese? My treat?"

Callie grinned. "Now, _that_ sounds good."

Arizona chuckled. "You still like Kirin?"

"You know me well." Callie cringed at her response as soon as she'd said it, remembering how she'd used to use that same expression when they'd been together. But it was true. As much as she and Arizona tried to forget it, they did, in fact, know each other well.

Better than anyone else, maybe.

Better than anyone else ever could, maybe.

* * *

After Arizona made a call to the restaurant to get food delivered, she and Callie made their way over to the couch, each trying to bury memories of everything they'd done on it, once upon a time.

"So..." Arizona prompted, mentally slapping herself. Why was she being so awkward?

"So...?" Callie repeated, hating how awkward they suddenly were with one another.

Arizona cleared her throat. "So, um, how did you meet your," she paused, "girlfriend?"

Before she had even finished, Callie was shaking her head. "I'm not talking to you about that," she chuckled.

"Oh. Okay," Arizona breathed, her voice betraying her unease.

Callie sighed, hating the thought that she'd hurt the blonde. God, she hated that thought. "No," she reached out and put a soothing hand on Arizona's arm. They both looked down at where Callie was now touching her, feeling a sudden jolt flow through them, from the top of their heads to the tips of their toes.

"Not because...I don't know. I just think it's weird. For us to talk about that, you know?" Carefully, she took in Arizona's vulnerable expression. "I don't want to hurt you."

Arizona shook her head rapidly, as if erasing the mere thought from her memory. "You won't. I mean, I'm the one who wanted to be...friendly...right? You don't have to worry about me."

Suddenly noticing her hand still over Arizona's shoulder, Callie lifted it, immediately missing the warmth, and awkwardly set it down on her own thigh. It felt like a cheap substitute.

"I know that I don't have to," Callie clarified. "But...I do." She guiltily met Arizona's intense eyes, shrugging, "I can't help it."

Arizona smiled in spite of herself. "I worry, too," she explained. "Which is why I was asking about her." She smiled jokingly. "I have to make sure she's good enough for you."

Callie looked at Arizona, promising, "Trust me, she is."

At this, it seemed that Arizona didn't even attempt to filter her words, arguing, "I doubt it."

Callie met her eyes in shock, immediately getting lost in cool blue pools. What the hell was she doing? Quickly, she changed the subject. "What about you? Have you dated anyone?"

Arizona shook her head. "Nope."

Callie cocked an eyebrow. It had been two and a half years. Was she really expected to believe that her ex-wife—her hot, smart ex-wife—hadn't been with anyone? "Really? No one?" she questioned, clearly dumbfounded.

"No one," Arizona swore. Then, self-conscious, she explained, "I've been really busy, you know, with two specialties. And..."

"And...?" Callie prompted, when Arizona didn't make a move to continue her thought.

Arizona bit her lip anxiously, meeting warm brown eyes. "And I guess no one else has caught my eye."

"I guess not," Callie replied, still shocked. But, she didn't ignore the obvious implication Arizona had made by saying "no one else." It was directed her way, that she was certain of.

It was then that the Chinese food was delivered, and Arizona quickly hopped up from the couch with an "I've got it!" She was eager for both food and a change of subject.

Callie got up, too, getting two plates and a number of forks from the kitchen and setting everything down on the coffee table.

When Arizona got back, she eyed the setup. "You wanted to eat in here?"

Callie shrugged. "Why not?"

Arizona smiled at her. "It's just like old times. Remember when you were doing your cartilage research? We must've eaten Chinese food every night."

Callie laughed, allowing herself to feel the warm memory. "You brought me takeout from here every time. Made it ten times better."

Arizona dimpled, just allowing herself to take in Callie's immense beauty for a moment. When the Latina was happy, she _glowed_. There was no other way to describe it. Arizona had missed being around that glow, and she most definitely had missed causing it.

"So, couch it is." She sat down, opening the containers of vegetable chow mein, steamed rice, spicy garlic green beans, sweet and sour chicken, and crispy potstickers.

Callie eyed Arizona. "Overboard, much?"

The blonde shrugged, unfazed. "I was hungry."

As they ate, Callie asked curiously, "Where are you living now that Meredith bought the house back?"

Arizona swallowed before answering. "A hotel, for now. I'm only ever there on my nights with Sof. On your nights, I just sleep on the couch in my office. Get more work done."

Callie nodded. It sounded so...lonely to her. Once again, she wished Arizona would have taken the house after their divorce. She was the one who had fallen in love with it, anyway.

"I'm looking into renting a house, though," Arizona continued. "There's a nice one two blocks from Mer's. Really nice neighborhood, and it's only one floor, which is good for me."

"You're not looking into buying anything?"

Arizona shook her head, a wistful smile pulling at her lips. "I haven't really found anywhere else that feels like home."

Again, with the word "else." This time, Callie couldn't help but feel sympathy for her ex. "You know," she cleared her throat. _Callie, what the hell are you doing?_ "You could always stay here until you figure out your next step. The house _is_ half yours. And there's a guest room. We'd barely even see each other!" She smiled, but she wasn't sure if it was optimistic or abysmal.

In truth, she _liked_ spending time with Arizona. She always had.

Arizona shook her head. That had been the last response she'd expected to hear from Callie. "Callie, I couldn't. Thank you for the offer, but I wouldn't want to intrude in your space."

"You wouldn't," Callie soothed. "You know Sofia would love it, and really, it'd make me feel less guilty about taking this place from you."

"You didn't take it," Arizona argued gently. "I gave it to you."

"And now I'm giving it back," Callie explained. She paused, thinking. "Half back, anyway."

Arizona sighed.

"Just think about it." _Callie, what the hell are you doing?!_ There was the voice again, and honestly, she didn't know _what_ she was doing. She had no idea how to respond to the part of her that was actually thinking critically. Because all she could think about was...

Well, there it was.

She'd been waiting for that smile. That real, genuine, _amazed_ smile, directed right at her.

"Okay," Arizona swore. "I'll think about it."

* * *

And Arizona had stayed true to her word. Three days later, she laid in her bed, still considering Callie's words.

It wasn't that the prospect of going home didn't completely thrill her, in this strange, calming sense. Because it did.

It was that "home" wasn't how she had left it. She wouldn't be going home to Callie and Sofia, as she had when she'd lived there in the past. She'd be going home to Sofia. Callie would just happen to be there.

Which was different. And, if she let herself admit it, it was painful to even imagine.

Because Callie would be there, but Callie wouldn't be _hers_. She was someone else's, instead.

Which was crazy. But it was also the reality.

She decided to track Callie down at work.

"Hey!" Arizona rushed towards the brunette, who was standing in front of the OR board.

Callie turned, smiling at her. Since that dinner, it almost felt as if they'd gotten a new start. A better start—at least compared to the awful start of not being together that followed the last couple's therapy appointment. "Hey."

"Did you mean what you said? About the house?"

Callie turned to her, offering her undivided attention. "I meant it, Arizona. Did you think about it?"

Arizona nodded. "I think," she paused. "I think you should ask the woman you're seeing if it's okay, before I say anything. I wouldn't want to overstep or come between you two."

Callie nodded back, touched by her ex-wife's thoughtfulness. "Sure," she smiled. "I'll talk to her."

And so she did.

"I just..." Callie began. "I feel like I have to help her. We bought the house together, and she's kind of homeless right now."

"Homeless?" the woman questioned.

"Not _homeless_ homeless!" Callie quickly clarified. "She's a doctor for crying out loud. But _between houses_. That's a better term for it. I just want her to have somewhere to stay until she starts renting her own place."

The woman on the other end of the line sighed. "I'm just worried that she's taking advantage of you."

"She's not." The woman clearly didn't know Arizona.

"And I know that you don't love her like that anymore, but are you sure she isn't still in love with you?"

"We're friends." It was a weak explanation, but it was all she knew to be true. "And she's Sofia's mom."

"I know," the woman exhaled deeply. "I'm not going to forbid you from it or anything like that, but just think before you do anything, okay? You can say I wouldn't let you, if that makes it easier. I just want you to be sure before you invite her into your home."

"Okay," Callie sighed. "I will." She didn't want to think, though. She didn't want to think about potential consequences or issues or whatever. She wanted to give this a shot. Even if she wasn't sure exactly why it was so important to her. She just knew that it was.

* * *

This time, it was Callie who sought out Arizona, a few days later. She walked towards her office in the Pediatrics ward, knocking gently before opening it at a friendly, "Come in!"

Arizona was sitting on her couch, overdressing a salad and taking a break from standing. Callie noticed that her prosthesis was laying on the floor and her hair was disheveled.

"Is everything okay?" Callie asked.

"Yeah," Arizona sighed. "Long day. My leg's not happy with me."

Callie frowned sympathetically. "Maybe seeing Sof tonight would help?"

Arizona knit her eyebrows together. "It's your night with her." Then, she took in Callie's knowing smile. " _OOOH_."

Callie grinned. "You're good to move your stuff in." But, quickly, her eyes widened, as she realized she had been presumptuous. "That is, if you even want to."

Arizona grinned back, her face suddenly only expressing complete and utter joy. "Are you sure?"

If Callie could have smiled any wider, she would have. Just seeing how happy Arizona was made her heart soar. "Positive. Please say yes."

" _Yes_!" Arizona exclaimed. "Oh, thank you, Callie," she thanked gratefully.

"Don't mention it. Do you need help getting your stuff?"

Arizona shook her head. "I don't want to hassle you. I don't have much. All the furniture and art and stuff is still with you."

"You can have it back," Callie offered, chuckling. "When you get your own house and actually have a place to decorate."

"Right," Arizona smiled, then quickly sobered up, her smile fading as she remembered that, really, she wasn't going home.

She was just visiting.

* * *

 **Okay, so I saw a post on Tumblr called "100 ways to say I love you," one of which was "I dreamt about you." Another of which was "I saved you a seat," so I went with 'em.**

 **Also, of course I had to have Arizona say something random and have Callie respond with, "What?"**

 **Too funny. I'll never get over that part of their dynamic.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary:**

 **The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again.**

 **When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. When people are in pain, they sometimes go directly to the source of what hurt them, hoping that this time will be different.**

 **Hoping that they'll be stronger. Better. Smarter. Kinder.**

 **Better equipped to work through the pain and to be happy.**

 **Stronger to prevent the next injury.**

 **Sometimes, it's only wishful thinking.**

 **And, other times,** **it works.**

* * *

 **Welp, I decided this may be a wee bit longer than I originally anticipated, so I made a separate fic for it! Let me know what you think!**

* * *

When Arizona finally got home—or, to her old house, anyway—it was late.

She walked in, finding Callie perched on the couch, reading a book.

"Oh, hey," Callie smiled towards her. "Can I help you carry your stuff in?"

Arizona made a face. "Nah. I got what I need for tonight, and I'll get the rest in the morning. Too much work." She plopped down on the couch beside Callie, then widened her eyes in embarrassment. "Oh, I'm sorry," she apologized. "You're in here. I didn't mean to be—"

Immediately, Callie was shaking her head. "No, you can be here, too. We can peacefully coexist in the same room," she smiled.

"I just don't want to be that roommate who invades your space."

"You're not," Callie promised. "Anyway, I'm pretty sure _I'm_ that person. At least I was—quite literally—the last time you and I tried to be roommates."

Arizona flushed, remembering her tainted last memory of sex with Callie. Then, curiously, she looked up and met her eyes.

"What?" Callie asked.

"We're... _friends_ , right?"

Callie shrugged amicably. "As much as we can be, anyway."

Arizona nodded in acceptance. "Does that mean that I can ask you a personal question?"

Callie's eyes darkened in worry. "Depends."

Arizona sighed. "I just...I always wondered why our last night happened the way it did. Day twenty-nine."

Callie sighed, understanding how long this question must have been eating away at the blonde.

"Did you just...I don't know, want to go out on a high note?" Arizona continued, old, unhealed wounds revealing themselves as she continued with trepidation. "Have sex one last time before divorcing me?"

"No!" Callie moved towards her ex-wife without thinking, but she pulled back before giving into instinct and touching the blonde. "No. Of course not."

"What, then?" Arizona asked sincerely. She had wondered this for a long, long time. "Why would you do that just to end everything the next day?"

Callie sighed. "I didn't think I was going to end everything. I thought...I tried to convince myself we were okay."

"What happened?" There was endless pain in Arizona's watery blue eyes.

"We _weren't_ okay. That's why you wanted the break to begin with. That's why you went on and on about how much you loved me in therapy before I left. You knew we weren't okay; you knew you weren't happy, and you were trying so hard to stay with me, anyway."

"Callie, I—" Arizona defended.

"No, don't deny it. You were right. I just didn't realize it until that last session." She exhaled a calming breath. "And I...that last night...I was scared it was going to be _you_ who ended things the next day. I felt...I felt like I needed to remind you that you still loved me."

"What?" Arizona looked at her in shock.

"Arizona, come on. You kept saying you loved me and needed me, but there wasn't action behind it, you know? I just...I wanted to remind you that we had something special. That we _were_ special, once upon a time." She sighed, anxiously bringing her eyes up to meet her ex-wife's.

Arizona met her eyes, and they shared a long moment of understanding, eyes imploring the souls beneath.

"I wish I hadn't made you think that you had to remind me," Arizona apologized. "I could never forget how much I love you."

There it was. Love. Present tense.

But, then, it didn't mean anything. Not anymore.

"Maybe," Callie smiled sadly. "But you and I both knew that love wasn't enough."

Arizona inhaled sharply and nodded. Unfortunately, Callie was right. If it had been, they wouldn't have been in the position they were then. They would have still been together. "Thank you," she murmured solemnly.

Callie cocked her head at the blonde. "For what?"

Arizona shrugged. "For being honest. For letting this get a little heavy." She cracked a smile, "At least we're not crying."

Callie laughed. "Imagine Sof waking up and seeing us in here, sobbing. That'd be a tough one to explain."

Arizona joined into her ex-wife's laughter, thankful for the change in mood. Even more, she was thankful for another ounce of closure.

"Anyway," Arizona began, "I should get to bed."

Callie nodded. "Right. Me, too."

Arizona smiled. "Thank you for letting me stay here, Callie."

Callie twinkled back. "You're welcome. Goodnight, Arizona."

"Goodnight, Callie."

Arizona walked towards the guest room to get her shampoo and conditioner, and Callie looked after her and then got ready for bed, herself.

Twenty minutes later, Arizona walked back towards her room, and the rest of the house was pitch black and as silent as an empty graveyard.

Finally, essentials unpacked, body showered, face washed, teeth brushed, pajamas adorned, Arizona walked towards the bed, ready to sleep for a lifetime. Her leg was still killing her, as it had been earlier that day.

She was stopped, however, by something on her bed.

She looked more closely. There, on her bed, waiting for her, was an ice pack and container of Advil.

Callie knew her well, indeed.

* * *

Callie and Arizona continued to peacefully coexist and to work on beginning a friendship during the following few weeks, slowly finding a comfortable routine in attempt to give the other privacy, whenever possible.

On one of Arizona's nights with Sofia, Callie strode in as she was doing the dishes with a, "Hey, would you maybe want to go out to dinner with Sof tomorrow night?"

Arizona shrugged amicably. "I could do that. Do you need the house for something?"

Callie looked down, shuffling her feet slightly. "I wanted to, um, invite over the woman I'm seeing for a home-cooked meal. We're not really serious enough that I want Sofia to join us, especially without checking with you first. But I would like her to come over."

Arizona's mouth scrunched up in thought. No, she did not want to take Sofia out to dinner. She did not want Callie to bring a woman home. But she had no right to say that, and Callie was being as kind as she could about the whole situation, thankfully. "Sure," Arizona finally smiled. "Sof and I will get out of the house for a while tomorrow to give you two some privacy."

Callie winced at Arizona's remarkable ability to read her nuances, but she nodded in reply. "Thank you."

* * *

Arizona had stayed true to her word, taking Sofia out to dinner and to a movie, then tiptoeing inside and gingerly placing an already sleeping five-year-old in her twin bed.

 _Callie must have decided to turn in early_ , Arizona thought; the lights were off in her room and only silence emanated throughout the house. That is, until she walked from the bathroom towards her own bedroom and heard an unfamiliar giggle from behind the door, followed by the sound of kissing.

She felt her throat constrict. Her stomach fell to the floor. A giant wave of nauseousness rolled over her, drowning her, again and again.

She realized then that _the woman_ —Callie's girlfriend—was sleeping over. And nothing could have prepared Arizona for that.

She immediately rushed into her room, found her phone and shoved her headphones into her ears, hoping that her old running playlist might be able to bury both the disturbing noise and her own disturbing thoughts.

She did not want to think about Callie sleeping with another woman. And, more than that, she did not want to think about how awful the mere thought of that made her feel.

It was silly. It was stupid. She'd accepted that her ex-wife had moved on. She'd accepted their "friendship." She had no reason to feel so...sick.

Sick to her stomach and, more acutely, lovesick.

It was ridiculous.

But as much as she tried, she couldn't get used to the thought that Callie was having sex right then, in their old bed, directly across the hall from her. With another woman.

She quickly donned her prosthesis, grabbed the blanket on the end of her bed, and scurried into the living room, deciding to sleep on the couch and as far as possible from Callie's room. It wasn't incredibly comfortable, but it was better than the alternative.

* * *

Callie woke up early the following morning, wanting to make sure the woman sleeping beside her went home before Sofia or Arizona woke up.

Not because she wanted to protect Arizona or anything. It was for the best. That was all.

"Hey," she gently nudged the beautiful woman.

The woman languidly opened her eyes, smiling at Callie. "Time for me to go?"

Callie smiled apologetically. "I start work soon. I can make you coffee, though?"

The woman shook her head, climbing out of bed and putting her clothes on from the night before. "Thank you, Callie, but I'm fine. And, oh," she looked up, a salacious glint in her eye, "Thank you for last night."

Callie grinned, winking, "The pleasure was all mine." Arizona had always groaned at her sense of humor, but now, her girlfriend laughed with her.

As soon as they were both dressed appropriately, Callie opened her bedroom door, chivalrously inviting the woman to exit the room before following after her.

They walked towards kitchen and entryway, and Callie felt the scent of hot coffee invade her senses.

She gulped. That could only mean that Arizona was already awake.

"So, maybe this weekend I could take you to that new French place?" the woman offered. "It has really good—" she stopped short, having spotted a radiantly gorgeous blonde sitting at the bar, sipping a cup of coffee.

Having heard two sets of feet shuffle in, Arizona's eyes widened as she looked up. She knew that she was up early, but she had expected Callie to have made her date leave much earlier, just in case Sofia woke up.

But no. The woman was still there, standing by the kitchen, staring at her.

"Hello," Arizona lowered her mug. She looked between the woman and Callie, whose face was pink and whose hands were wringing together in anxiety.

Deciding to be the "bigger person"—whatever that meant—Arizona stood up, nearing the woman and holding out her hand.

"Hi. Arizona Robbins. You must be Calliope's girlfriend."

The woman's eyes widened, but she met the outstretched hand with her own. "Yeah. Hi. I've heard good things about you."

Arizona offered the woman her most charming smile. "Likewise. Did you want some coffee?"

The woman quickly waved the thought off. "Oh, no, thank you. I should really get going."

Arizona nodded in understanding, working hard to bite back her bitterness. "'Course. I'm sure we'll see more of each other."

All Callie could do was stand there, looking between the two woman—her old love and her current love—and pray that their little encounter wouldn't scare the woman she liked away. _Or hurt Arizona_ , Callie worried, surprised that the thought came to mind.

The woman turned back to Callie. "Well, I'm going to go. Thank you, again," she smiled and turned away, not even going in for a peck on the lips or cheek. She didn't want to be the cause of any _additional_ awkwardness.

"Bye!" Callie called after her. As soon as the door shut, she turned and looked at Arizona, who had sat back down and continued sipping her coffee, refusing to meet Callie's curious eyes.

"You're up early," Callie commented conversationally, walking over to the coffee pot to fill up her mug. She didn't want to talk about what had just taken place.

"I couldn't sleep," Arizona admitted, just as willing to avoid a conversation about the woman she had just met.

Callie turned to look at her, eyes wide in fear, and she saw Arizona blush.

"I mean," the blonde quickly excused, "I'm stressed. Work stuff."

Sighing in relief, Callie sat down at the bar stool beside her. "What's going on?" she asked worriedly. "Anything I can do to help?"

Arizona smiled at the eternally thoughtful woman sitting beside her. Callie was beautiful externally—that much was obvious. But what eclipsed that was her immense, endless _care_. She cared about people more than anyone else—even about Arizona, which filled her with warmth.

After everything that had happened, her ex-wife was still eager to help. And, if Callie ever needed anything, Arizona would be more than willing to do the same.

"No," she smiled. "Nothing major. What about you? How's work?"

Callie sighed. "Stressful, actually. I have a major meeting with donors for my robotic prosthetic limb project. I need a lot more money for the next step."

Arizona raised her eyebrows. "What's the next step?"

"I want to use aluminum prostheses instead of carbon fiber. I know that carbon fiber is supposedly the most renowned these days, but I think aluminum would work even better, and it'd be cheaper for the project and the patients in the long run."

Arizona nodded, urging Callie to continue. Talking about the project had filled her with a sense of dread back when she had thought Callie had only been doing it to make up for maiming her in the first place, but things had been different then.

Since then, she'd learned that Callie hadn't been the one to incapacitate her, and she regretted not giving her ex-wife support and encouragement back when the brunette had needed it.

Seeing Arizona's noticeable—albeit surprising—interest, Callie continued, "Molecularly, carbon fiber is just far less durable; like, the epoxy composite properties are significantly reduced once the temperature goes up above 150 F., particularly in humidity. And though it's lighter and a lower density theoretically, since the fibers have to be layered in multiple directions for use, it ends up having properties more like aluminum—except it ends up being heavier."

"So switching to aluminum would be the cheaper, better, more efficient option," Arizona deduced.

"Right!" Callie exclaimed, getting excited about the topic. "But I need to make a prototype of the prosthesis and get it working on someone so that I can present it at the meeting."

"Do you have any of your previous patients in mind?" Arizona asked curiously.

"Yeah. I did," Callie began. "I've really found success with a former police officer I was treating, but unfortunately, he and his new fiancé decided to go sight-seeing through Europe for six months."

"No fair," Arizona pouted.

Callie laughed. "That's what I said. It also means that I need to find a different amputee willing to go through a still highly experimental project, and quickly."

"I could help," Arizona piped up without thinking.

Callie's eyes widened in surprise. Arizona had never wanted to be involved in her research in the past.

"I'm serious," the blonde confirmed, easily reading her ex-wife's expression. "It sounds like what you're doing is awesome, and I'd love to be involved. That is, if I meet the qualifications."

"You do," Callie quipped, and Arizona looked at her questioningly. Callie paused. "I...started this whole thing because of you," she admitted. "Originally, I mean," she quickly added. "So, you _are_ the qualifications."

Arizona nodded slowly, processing the information she had always suspected but hadn't confirmed until that moment. This project had been a gift from Callie to her, and until then, she had been unwilling to accept it.

Seriously, she lifted her head and looked solemnly into her ex-wife's eyes. "Callie, that sounds really amazing."

Callie shrugged humbly.

"And you're changing lives," she continued. "Do you think...maybe...it would be possible for me to volunteer as a member of your project?"

A dazzling smile shone on Callie's face, and she felt herself release a shaky, long-held breath. She'd been holding it for years, maybe.

"I thought you'd never ask."

* * *

 **P.S. Leave reviews for a happy writer :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary:**

 **The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again.**

 **When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. When people are in pain, they sometimes go directly to the source of what hurt them, hoping that this time will be different.**

 **Hoping that they'll be stronger. Better. Smarter. Kinder.**

 **Better equipped to work through the pain and to be happy.**

 **Stronger to prevent the next injury.**

 **Sometimes, it's only wishful thinking.**

 **And, other times,** **it works.**

* * *

 **Disclaimer: Any dialogue that sounds familiar belongs to Shondaland.**

* * *

"So, this is it," Callie welcomed as she and Arizona walked into the spacious physical therapy room she had taken over for her project.

Arizona looked around, realizing "Wasn't this the room where you—"

"Had physical therapy after the car crash?" Callie finished, predicting what the blonde was asking.

Arizona nodded.

"Yeah," Callie smiled. "But I like the place much better now." She motioned for Arizona to sit down in one of two chairs, then sat down in the other, facing the blonde.

Arizona looked at Callie expectantly, and Callie began, "Before you agree to do this—"

"I already have," Arizona interjected.

And she had. She was all in. Callie needed a volunteer who met the project's qualifications, and _she_ met them. So how could she, in good conscience, not help her ex-wife succeed?

She couldn't. When Callie was happy, she was happy. That was the way it had always been, and it appeared that it was the way it would always be.

So she was all in. Despite her own reservations and fears, she was all in.

"Before we start anything," Callie corrected herself, giving into Arizona's stubbornness. "I think you should learn a little more about the expectations and process."

Arizona nodded, ready to listen.

"Okay," Callie began carefully. "So, I'm not your doctor or anything. I'm not your prosthetist or anything; that's still Dr. Moore." She paused. "Well, I'm _kind of_ your prosthetist. For now, anyway. But I won't be long-term, so long as the prosthesis works and I can teach Moore how to make minor adjustments."

"Okay...?" Arizona confirmed. Why was that all relevant?

"I'm not your doctor," Callie repeated. "I promise. Just because you do this, I won't automatically become your doctor."

Arizona laughed uncomfortably, Callie's abruptness making her anxious. "Callie, you said that."

"I know," Callie fretted. "But, you know, the distinction was really important to you before: that I was your wife, not your doctor, after the plane crash. Now, I'm your ex-wife. Not your doctor. Instead...maybe I'm just..." she took a second to think. "Your inventor."

Arizona smiled tenderly, feeling immensely endeared by the brunette. "Hey, it's okay," she assured her. "That was completely different. Whatever you are now is just fine."

Callie still looked apprehensive.

"Seriously, Callie," Arizona swore. "Thank you for making it clear that you're " _my inventor_ ", but you don't have to do that. Really."

Slowly, Callie nodded, accepting the sincerity in the blonde's voice. "Okay, next point, then?"

Arizona smiled encouragingly.

Callie stood up from her chair, walking over to the white board several feet away. "So, about the project. We're going to remap the remaining nerves from your leg, and that will allow brain signals to be sent to the prosthesis." She began drawing out a simple diagram. "Then, you'll be able to control it due to electrical impulses sent directly from the brain, and it won't just feel like dead weight. It'll be controlled with your mind, just like your other leg."

Arizona widened her eyes. "Wow."

"Yeah," Callie smiled nervously. "Before that happens, though, you'll obviously have to undergo a minor brain surgery. And I'll have to create a custom socket and work with Moore to create a new prosthesis, and all that."

Arizona cringed. "Is there really such thing as a _minor_ brain surgery?"

Callie shrugged helplessly, making a face. "I guess not. But Amelia's done it before, and she's good. You would be in very good hands. And I would never encourage you to go through with it if I wasn't confident that it would be successful." Even then—divorced and in a strange new friendship—Callie couldn't stomach the idea of Arizona ever just...ceasing to exist. The thought made her physically sick, she noticed, feeling her stomach dip.

Exhaling a relieved breath, Arizona nodded. "Okay. I trust you."

Callie smiled. It felt good to hear those words; for a long time, she felt as if the blonde hadn't trusted her. So, in that moment, the long-awaited words meant something.

"What will happen after the surgery?" Arizona asked, urging Callie to continue.

"You'll take a few days off. I'll wait on your hand and foot," she winked jovially, and Arizona rolled her eyes. "Then, we'll come back in here, you'll make sure the equipment fits and feels okay, and we'll practice using it for twenty minutes a day until, hopefully, it just feels like a fourth limb."

"That's it?" Arizona raised her eyebrows.

"It's harder than it sounds," Callie laughed. Then, she eyed her ex-wife carefully. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

Arizona nodded sincerely. "I'm sure. And I'm sorry that I didn't sooner."

Callie smiled wistfully. She was sorry, too. But, more than that, she was grateful that Arizona was willing to except her help now. "Don't be. You'll be great."

Arizona dimpled. " _We'll_ be great," she corrected. After all, Callie was the mastermind behind the project. Arizona herself was only the lowly volunteer amputee.

"Right," Callie twinkled back. "Together."

"Together," Arizona confirmed.

* * *

"Amelia, how are you doing?" Callie asked, rushing into the attendings' lounge immediately after having spotted the neurosurgeon.

"Pretty good, actually," Amelia bragged, not looking up from the coffee she was pouring. "I woke up at 2 a.m. to kick ass on a surgery, and now I'm going to kick some more ass on your ex-wife's this afternoon." She looked up, smirking at Callie. "It's going to be a good day."

Callie raised her eyebrows. She wanted to believe that Amelia's confidence was warranted—and her past experience with the woman let her know that it was, but still. She was on edge. She didn't feel assured by Amelia's words, because she was going to be doing brain surgery on Arizona later that day.

And, though Callie's head told her that her ex-wife would be fine, her heart was beating erratically in her chest, and she felt like she might vomit at any moment.

"About that..." Callie bit her lip. "Will, uh, will you have help?"

Amelia furrowed her eyebrows.

"I'm just," Callie frowned. "Are you going to be doing this whole surgery yourself? I'm just, I mean...given everything...is it a good idea?"

Amelia set down her styrofoam cup of coffee and crossed her arms. "What are you saying?"

"Nothing. It's just that—"

"Oh, I get it," Amelia interrupted. "You still love her, and you're scared I'll kill her."

Callie's eyes widened. "What?! No. I don't—"

"Yes, you do," Amelia insisted. "And I'm going to go now, and you're going to stop second guessing my immense talent and skill, because I don't do too well in situations where people are feeling one way and pretending to feel another. So you," she signaled to Callie, "Chill out and do some soul-searching. I'm going to go do my job, and I'll see you after Arizona's surgery."

And, with that, she walked out the door, leaving a stunned Callie alone in the familiar lounge.

Callie most definitely did not _love_ Arizona, despite Amelia's knowing words.

Callie cared about her—she would always care about her—but she wasn't in love with the woman anymore.

Too much had happened; too many things had changed; too much time had passed.

Her heart had broken and burst one too many times.

She couldn't have loved Arizona anymore. She didn't.

Callie just wanted to make sure that she would be okay.

She didn't love her. She didn't.

She didn't.

She didn't.

She couldn't.

She just needed her to be okay.

* * *

 **Thank you all so much for the amazing reviews and for reading this thing!**

 **Let me know what you think :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary:**

 **The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again.**

 **When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. When people are in pain, they sometimes go directly to the source of what hurt them, hoping that this time will be different.**

 **Hoping that they'll be stronger. Better. Smarter. Kinder.**

 **Better equipped to work through the pain and to be happy.**

 **Stronger to prevent the next injury.**

 **Sometimes, it's only wishful thinking.**

 **And, other times,** **it works.**

* * *

"Callie, if you bring me one more donut, I will kill you with my own bare hands," Arizona called from where she was resting in bed as she heard footsteps nearing her room.

She popped an eye open, and there was Callie herself, a plate of donuts in her hand. Callie smiled guiltily.

Arizona scowled. "No amount of donuts is going to help get rid of the headache the stupid surgery caused."

"But they taste good," Callie sing-songed, setting the sugary pastries on the blonde's bedside table. "Okay, what will help, then?" she asked sincerely. Since Arizona had gotten her targeted muscle reinnervation surgery a few days before, Callie had fulfilled her promise to wait on her ex-wife's hand and foot.

Arizona was—in part—participating in the project for her, anyway. She would be foolish not to realize that. So, Callie knew that she had to do her part to make the process as painless as possible for her ex-wife.

"Sleep," Arizona lamented, throwing an arm over her eyes. "But I can't sleep."

Callie sighed sympathetically. "We could...watch something?"

Arizona grumbled something incoherent.

"Right," Callie understood. "Makes the headache worse. We could..."

"Distract me," Arizona instructed. "How was your day?"

"Well," Callie gingerly sat down on the edge of the bed. "I had a standard hip replacement that went well. And...I talked to Mer about getting the girls together for a sleepover this weekend..."

"Yay!" Arizona cheered excitedly on her daughter's behalf, then groaned a second later. "Ow. Too much yay."

Callie chuckled while, meanwhile, allowing herself a moment to check out the beautiful woman lying in bed: looking as perfect as ever, even with tousled blonde hair, a pained grimace, and her crumpled pajama top riding up, revealing a thin strip of porcelain skin underneath.

She was really, really beautiful. Even if Callie had moved on—which, for the record, she _had_ , despite Amelia's erroneous claims—she would never quite be able to get over Arizona's extraordinary beauty.

She...glowed. Shone from the inside out. There was no other way to describe her.

"What else?" Arizona prompted when Callie didn't continue.

"Oh," Callie shook herself from her trance. "My favorite nurse—"

"Paige?"

"Yeah!" Callie exclaimed, surprised that her ex-wife had remembered. "She's apparently going on maternity leave starting next week. Bed rest."

"Aw," Arizona tisked in sympathy. "It'll be worth it when the baby comes, though."

"Yeah," Callie smiled, thinking of a smushy little baby. "Hey, did you hear about Sof's new career plan?"

"No," Arizona exhaled, relaxing into the comfort of the bed. "Tell me."

"She still wants to be a doctor like her mommies and a princess, of course, but she _also_ wants to be a firefighter."

"Really?" Arizona asked curiously, a proud smiled adorning her face.

"Mhmm," Callie confirmed, grinning. "Which means that she'll save even more lives than we do."

Eyes still shut, Arizona mirrored her ex-wife's expression as her lips drew up into a grin. "That's our girl."

* * *

"Good morning, sweetie," Arizona cooed as she walked into the kitchen, stopping at Sofia's chair to gently kiss her on the head. "How'd you sleep?"

"Good," Sofia replied, continuing to smack her lips together as she chewed her breakfast. "Wanna donut?"

Arizona widened her eyes at her daughter, then turned and narrowed them at Callie. "You're giving our daughter _donuts_ for breakfast?"

Callie met her eyes sheepishly. "What was I supposed to do? I bought _three dozen_ for you to eat while you recovered, but you won't eat any more of them!"

Arizona sat down in the chair beside Sofia, conceding to her ex-wife's somewhat valid explanation. "Is it yummy, Sof? What kind are you having?"

The little girl grinned. "Chocolate. It's my favowite."

Arizona laughed. "I know! Chocolate's yummy, huh?"

"Mm hmm," Sofia nodded enthusiastically.

Callie sat down across from them at the table, setting a bowl of oatmeal and a mug of coffee in front of Arizona, then taking a bite of her own.

Arizona made a face. "Oatmeal? Yuck."

Callie glared at her. "Do you want a donut?"

Arizona shook her head childishly. "No more donuts."

"Eat the oatmeal, then," Callie looked at her expectantly. "I know you don't _love_ it, but I added your favorite toppings, and you need to have your energy up today! We're going to practice using the new leg whenever we can each find a spare hour."

"Fine," Arizona pouted.

"Hey," Callie reached towards the blonde in attempt to get her attention.

Arizona looked up.

"Isn't this at least a little exciting?"

Arizona smiled softly, allowing herself to be vulnerable. This was Callie, after all. "Yeah, it is."

Callie smiled enthusiastically at her before quickly drawing her attention to Sofia, not wanting to dwell on the moment.

She was excited, too. But she was also nervous.

She was nervous about working so closely with Arizona.

And, more than that, she was nervous that she might crave it.

* * *

"Hey!" the woman smiled as soon as Callie answered the phone.

"Hey, yourself," Callie smiled, happy to be hearing the voice of the woman she liked.

"What are you doing tonight?" the woman asked.

"Nothing. No, wait! I have to do some prosthesis project stuff with Arizona, but then nothing; it's her night with Sof."

"Would you want to come over, by any chance?" the woman husked.

"I think you might be able to convince me," Callie grinned. "Can I bring anything?"

"Just your hot self."

Callie laughed. "Anytime. See you at eight?"

"Yes!" the woman cheered. "Actually, I'm not sure I can wait that long. Can I meet you at the hospital?"

"Sounds great."

* * *

"Callie, you're all dressed up!" Arizona noted as she walked into the room. "We don't have to do this tonight, if I'm keeping you from something."

Callie quickly shook her head. "This project is my number one priority."

"Yeah?" Arizona asked. To her, that somehow felt like Callie might be saying that she _herself_ was a top priority. On the other hand, that may have just been wishful thinking.

Callie nodded. "It's important. What we're doing. It'll change lives."

Arizona smiled. "Maybe it'll change mine."

Callie smiled back. "I hope so. Come on, sit down."

Arizona, who was dressed in a t-shirt and loose, short running shorts, sat in a chair, and Callie pulled one up in front of her, bringing with her the prosthesis and socket.

She looked up and met ocean-blue eyes, nearly drowning in them. "Can...Can I help you put it on?"

Arizona shrugged, indicating indifference. Inside, however, her heartbeat was nearing the danger zone. Callie was so close that she could smell her. And she smelled really, really good.

"Not your doctor. Just your inventor," Callie reminded the blonde as she picked up the socket.

Arizona rolled her eyes at her overly cautious ex-wife, but she also felt a sudden pang of guilt knowing that she gave Callie good reason for worry.

"Callie," Arizona began.

"Hmm?" Callie cautiously met her eyes.

"You know why I was so determined for you to be strictly my wife after the crash, right?"

Callie shook her head thoughtfully. "I don't." With frustration, she thought back to the weeks and months after the crash, when Arizona wouldn't so much as let her _see_ the amputation site to assuage pain and provide assistance. All she had wanted to do was help as a wife who had been uniquely qualified to do so, but Arizona had never let her. And Callie had never quite learned why.

The blonde smiled sadly. "Here's not the place. But, you don't have to keep reminding me that you're 'just the inventor.' Right now, you're my doctor, too. I know that, and I'm okay with it."

Callie carefully weighed her ex-wife expression before finally responding. "Okay. But you'll tell me? Later?"

Arizona nodded tensely. "Tomorrow, because it looks like you have a date tonight."

Callie didn't bother to deny it. There was no reason she should have felt the need to keep her new relationship private. Right?

"But I'll tell you," Arizona assured her. "Promise."

Callie smiled, nodding once in acceptance. "So, now, Dr. Robbins," she began, changing the subject. "May I...?"

Arizona nodded, preparing herself for Callie to remove her current prosthesis and replace it with the new-and-improved aluminum device.

Sucking in a breath in preparation, Callie brought her hands up to the socket, turning it counterclockwise and removing it from her ex-wife's stump.

Arizona cringed when she looked down: there were red lines on her thigh that her tight prosthetic limb had caused during the course of the day. Ouch.

Callie winced in sympathy. "Maybe we should start doing mornings, instead."

Arizona shrugged apathetically. "It's fine, Callie. I'm pretty used to it," she smiled.

Callie raised her eyebrows at her ex-wife, both surprised and pleased by Arizona's blatant acceptance of her reality—something she had lacked during the first few years following her amputation.

Unthinkingly, she reached forward and ghosted her fingertips down the angry marks defacing Arizona's perfect ivory skin. She felt her breath quicken and attempted to hold it so that the blonde wouldn't notice.

Arizona looked down, following her ex-wife's quivering thumb with her eyes. Callie seemed to be in a trance—completely disconnected from anything else.

Gently, Arizona cleared her throat. Callie jumped, tearing her hand away from Arizona as if she were hot oil.

"Right," Callie apologized. She grabbed the aluminum prosthesis off the floor and deftly positioned it over Arizona's appendage and into place. " _Okay_ ," she said decisively, feeling the blonde's questioning eyes on her. "Are you ready to try walking?"

Swallowing her questions (because _what on earth_ had just happened?), Arizona nodded, moving to stand up.

Callie stood along with her, moving the chairs out of the way and tentatively holding out her hands for Arizona to take if she needed to.

But Arizona just raised her eyebrows, and Callie put up her hands in defeat. "Sorry. You don't need me. Got it."

The blonde smiled, taking a deep breath before she tentatively took a step forward.

As she did so successfully, she looked up at Callie, proud that she was able to maneuver her new device just as easily as she could her usual prosthesis.

Callie twinkled encouragingly. "How's it feel?"

Arizona continued moving forward, taking one step after another. "It feels...the same."

Callie waved her off. "It takes practice. The more you use it, the more comfortable it'll feel. Which is why we need to come here and practice every day."

Arizona nodded.

"Today, why don't we just do a few laps?" Callie moved to walk beside the blonde, easily keeping up with her assured stride.

"So," Arizona began after a few minutes of walking in comfortable silence. "What are you two up to tonight?"

Callie pursed her lips together. "Dinner."

"Awesome," Arizona attempted to respond neutrally. "Will you, um, will you be home later?"

Callie nervously eyed the blonde, privy to the real question Arizona was asking. "I think so," she finally replied.

In truth, she hoped that she would be home later that evening. As much as she really, really liked her new girlfriend, she had come to appreciate the routine of having breakfast with Sofia and Arizona every morning. She didn't want to miss out on it.

Telling Arizona that, though, would likely not be a good idea. Telling the woman she liked would be an even worse idea. Callie didn't want her to worry or be jealous; there was nothing to be worried or jealous of. Callie had moved on, after all.

She and Arizona were purely platonic.

"She seems really nice," Arizona eventually offered, attempting to keep the conversation pleasant. In fact, _she_ had seemed nice. And she had been pretty. Callie could have most definitely done worse.

"Thanks," Callie replied tightly, wanting to flee. This felt wrong. "I'm just...gonna get ready to go, if that's okay? I'm just going to run to the restroom to put on some lipstick and stuff. I'll see you in a few?" she watched Arizona's face carefully, looking for some sign that may reveal how she was feeling, but the blonde's expression was blank: carefully hidden.

"Sure," Arizona smiled, continuing to walk the perimeter of the wide room.

"Okay," Callie grabbed her purse then walked towards the restroom located on the other side of the room, turning back to look at Arizona once more before she opened the door and slid inside.

As soon as Callie closed the door to the bathroom, Arizona walked back to her chair and plopped into it, taking a breather and removing the aluminum prosthesis to swap it out with the one she was more familiar with.

In truth, the aluminum leg didn't feel any different, but it was _heavy_. She hadn't walked for long, but she found herself feeling tired and more than ready to stop.

She grabbed her jeans from her bag and slipped them on before making the independent decision to wait for Callie in the hallway outside.

* * *

"Oh, hello," Arizona greeted as she saw the woman standing on the other side of the door. Callie's girlfriend was there waiting. Of course.

"Oh. Arizona. Hi," the woman answered nervously. "How, um. How's the project going?"

Arizona shrugged. "It's going, I think." She sized up the woman. "You look really nice."

The woman awkwardly inspected her own outfit, as if she had forgotten what she was wearing. "This? Thanks," she attempted to smile.

Arizona smiled—perhaps a little wickedly—as she took in the woman's anxious demeanor.

"Can I confess something to you? Without you telling Callie?" the woman asked.

Arizona raised her eyebrows. "What don't you want me to tell her?"

The woman sighed. "It's just that," she paused. "You intimidate me. A little."

When Arizona didn't say anything, she continued, "It's just, you know, you two were married. And, obviously, she loved you for a long time. And you have a daughter together and you're still very much part of each other's lives. I know that it's different between the two of you, now, but it's still a little...intimidating to me, I guess."

At that confession, Arizona's lips turned up into an expression much more sincere. Damnit, she found that she might actually like this woman. "Don't be intimidated. Callie really likes you."

The woman smiled giddily. "I hope so."

At that, Callie walked through the double doors, stopping in her tracks as soon as she saw her girlfriend and ex-wife, smiling at one another. "Um. Hi?"

"Hi," the two women replied in unison, then turning to smirk at one another.

Callie narrowed her eyes. What had she missed?

Wanting to be a good _friend_ and give Callie her space, Arizona began walking towards the elevator, announcing, "I'm going to go get Sof. I'll see you later, Calliope!" She turned to look at the woman. "And it was nice to see you again."

"You, too," the woman replied, then turned back to Callie once Arizona was down the hall. "So... _Calli-oh-pee_ , are you ready to go?"

Callie's eyes bulged at her girlfriend's attempt to use her full name, and she quickly shook her head, chuckling, "I'm ready, but please don't call me that."

"Oh. Okay," the woman immediately agreed, wondering why it had been okay that Arizona had.

Callie wondered why, too.

* * *

 **Hi! A few notes:  
**

 **Some of you seem to have noticed that Callie's girlfriend is nameless and that we know very little about her; all I'm going to say about that is that there's a reason that she is remaining anonymous. And it's not because she's secretly Erica Hahn (ew).**

 **Also, I'm sorry if this chapter isn't as crisp; I've been writing it in my only spare moments, which include my breaks at work and short car rides! Exciting stuff is coming up, though, and I'll have time to write next week.**

 **Hope everyone's having a great weekend, and I'll talk to you soon! Please leave reviews for a happy writer :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary:**

 **The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again.**

 **When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. When people are in pain, they sometimes go directly to the source of what hurt them, hoping that this time will be different.**

 **Hoping that they'll be stronger. Better. Smarter. Kinder.**

 **Better equipped to work through the pain and to be happy.**

 **Stronger to prevent the next injury.**

 **Sometimes, it's only wishful thinking.**

 **And, other times,** **it works.**

* * *

"You're home!" Arizona called from the kitchen as she heard the front door close.

"Yeah. Hi," Callie called back, walking towards the sound of her ex-wife's voice. "How was your night with Sof?"

"Good," Arizona smiled. She was pleasantly surprised that Callie had come home; she had expected her to sleep over at her girlfriend's house. "How was your dinner?"

"Good," Callie responded simply, still feeling odd about talking about her current relationship with Arizona. Anxiously, she bit her lip. "If you're not too tired, I still would love to talk more about what you said earlier."

Arizona looked at Callie questioningly, folding up her dish towel to give the brunette her full attention.

"About...after the crash..." Callie hinted.

"Oh," Arizona breathed, remembering their earlier conversation. "Sure."

She and Callie meandered towards the couch—a spot that, thankfully, had always seemed to act as a buffer for the two of them.

As Callie got situated, she looked at Arizona expectantly. She hoped that they might have gotten to a place where they could talk about the aftermath of the plane crash without tears or yelling.

That conversation was to be a sort of test, and Callie found that her hands were sweating in nervous anticipation.

More than anything, she hoped that the past few years had given Arizona the space to heal, and their oncoming discussion would prove whether or not she had.

Arizona cleared her throat. She didn't know how to say what she needed Callie to know. She didn't want her ex-wife to think that her beliefs had been thoughtless or silly, especially when they had felt so real to her at the time.

"It's not...a huge deal," Arizona began. "And you might already know."

"Tell me anyway," Callie whispered.

Arizona nodded and swallowed hard. "Remember when Alex told me that he performed the amputation?"

Callie remembered.

"You never said anything because you didn't want me to resent him, too."

"Right," Callie agreed, feeling like she had to defend herself. "You already knew that I made the call, but I didn't think it mattered that he made the cut when it could have been any Grey Sloan surgeon."

"'It could have been anyone,'" Arizona repeated. "Even you."

Callie knit her eyebrows together. "No, hospital policy dictates that—"

"You can't operate on family members," Arizona finished. "You can't be their doctor. I know that's generally the case. But, you were the one who came up with my treatment plan; you were the one administering fluids and checking my vitals..."

Callie's eyes widened, beginning to put the pieces together. "Wait. You thought I...?" Was Arizona saying that she thought that _she_ had been the one to cut off her leg?

Arizona shrugged in embarrassed surrender. "I thought you did it."

Callie sucked in a quick breath, finally understanding. "'Go grab a bone saw, and let's even the score.'" In the present context, Arizona's words somehow meant something different. She hadn't despised Callie and wanted her to suffer for making the call to amputate Arizona's leg; at that point, it hadn't been about the decision at all.

Arizona had forgiven Callie for saving her life, but she'd been hung up on the action.

The carnage. The cut.

She'd been hung up on the act that no faithful, loving wife would be able to perform.

Until Alex had come clean, Arizona had thought that Callie had done the unimaginable. That Callie had cut her apart.

And Arizona had proceeded to do the unimaginable herself, with one hot, manipulative blonde surgeon.

With Callie sitting beside her, sculpted from marble, Arizona fretted, "I'm so sorry, Callie. I know it must sound ridiculous now..."

Callie shook her head. "It's not like you were thinking clearly at the time. I mean, you were dying. And everything happened so fast..."

"Still!" she exclaimed regretfully. "I blamed you for so long... I made so many awful decisions..."

Callie sighed. That was true.

But, in that moment, all the resentment she still held vanished—at least for the time being.

In many ways, Arizona must have thought that their marriage had lost its sanctity.

She had thought that Callie had done something unimaginable. After all, what kind of person could have cut of her own wife's leg?

Perhaps, she had felt that she could do something equally hurtful. Something that, before the plane crash, Callie hadn't even imagined Arizona would have been capable of doing.

She had thought that Callie had done something unimaginable. Something unforgivable.

And she'd retaliated with an act that was equally as hurtful, though it manifested differently.

"Arizona..." Callie breathed in sudden sympathy.

"That's why I fought you so much about being my doctor. That's why I couldn't let you help me when I needed it. And I'm sorry. It's my fault..."

"No." Without thinking, Callie reached out, soothingly rubbing her hand over her ex-wife's shoulder. "It's not your fault."

"It's not _your_ fault," Arizona corrected. "I know that, had I known, I would have hated you _and_ Alex. At least for a while. You...sacrificed...a lot for me to be okay."

"I did."

Arizona's eyes bore deeply into Callie's, a mixture of regret, shame, and pleading that the brunette would understand.

"But it's not your fault, either," Callie maintained.

"Some of it is," Arizona insisted, and she knew that Callie knew what she was referring to.

Callie sighed. "I was shocked that you could do that to me. That you could do it, and then not even really feel sorry."

Arizona looked down in shame. She was shocked, too.

"But _this_ helps," Callie admitted. "Knowing what you had been thinking, what had been going on in your head...I understand how you could do it. As best I can, anyway."

Slowly, Arizona nodded in acceptance. She had accepted a long time ago that Callie could never entirely forgive her. "You gave me closure. I wish I could give you the same."

Callie smiled sadly.

"It just...it wasn't because I didn't love you enough," Arizona promised. "I did. You were always enough. I thought that _I_ wasn't enough."

"You are," Callie exhaled. "You always are." That was a promise.

But Arizona wasn't convinced. After all, Callie wasn't with her. So, could she really be enough? Her lips turned up, but the weak smile didn't reach her eyes. "Maybe."

* * *

Though Arizona hadn't exactly given her closure, Callie felt as if a weight had been lifted off her shoulders.

She felt lighter than she had in years—something she wouldn't have thought possible until she felt it.

She felt free.

See, though after Arizona cheated on her, she had felt worthless and pathetic, she had regained her confidence over the course of the last few years.

She knew that she was good enough—for herself and for someone else.

She no longer questioned her own worth because of Arizona's callous actions.

But still, knowing that she had also always been enough for Arizona—that Arizona had still loved her tremendously—that many of their mistakes had in fact been misunderstandings—that meant something. Even if perhaps it shouldn't have.

It meant something.

Callie began to trust her happy memories of her marriage again. That Arizona had always loved her. That there had been so many happy, beautiful moments between them before it all went sour.

Remembering that felt good.

And, in many ways, their discussion allowed her to trust Arizona again, too.

"Good morning," she smiled at Arizona and Sofia as she walked into the kitchen for breakfast.

"Morning," Arizona smiled.

"What time can you go to the lab today?" Callie asked.

Arizona shrugged. "Seven? I'm going out for drinks with Alex and Jo at eight. It's your night with Sofia."

Callie nodded. "Sure."

* * *

Arizona was not looking forward to PT with Callie that evening. In fact, she was dreading it.

It had been a few weeks of practice walking, standing, kicking, and stretching daily, and the prosthesis still didn't feel any different.

If anything, it felt _worse_. She found the aluminum heavy and hard to maneuver, despite Callie's belief that it was the best option.

Still, the brunette had assured her that it would get better in time, and Arizona trusted her.

"Dr. Robbins!" Richard Webber ran down the hallway of the pediatric ward and directly towards her.

"Chief?" Arizona questioned. Though he was only the interim chief at the moment—and not for long—she still referred to him as his old title as a sign of respect.

"I was wondering if you'd considered running for chief."

"Me?" her eyes widened.

"Yes, you," Webber insisted. "You're one of the few doctors who have been awarded the Carter Madison grant, you're double board certified, and you're an excellent teacher and leader. I think you'd do a fine job, and I'd be happy to put in a good word for you with the Harper Avery Foundation."

Still shocked, Arizona shook her head. "Oh, thank you, sir, but I couldn't be chief right now. I have my plate full with Peds, family commitments, and other projects."

Webber nodded, a little disappointed but understanding. "I understand. If you change your mind, though, let me know. I believe that this hospital would do tremendously well with your leadership."

Arizona twinkled at the older man. "Thank you. I will."

As Webber walked away, Arizona allowed herself a moment to ruminate on what had just taken place. If she were being honest with herself, she would love to become chief, at some point during her career, anyway.

But, currently, it was not her biggest priority. What mattered to her most then was ensuring that Callie succeeded in her project, and Arizona had to put all her remaining energy towards that.

Because, God, she loved Callie. And Callie deserved everything.

Arizona wasn't pining for her, though; not anymore. She understood the circumstances. She had accepted their...friendship. It wasn't enough—it would never be enough—but it had to be.

Arizona knew that she would begin dating again, one day. Not that day. But someday, when she wanted to, she would.

The truth was that she was okay with being alone, for the time being. She was okay with being single and working and raising Sofia and having to give herself orgasms. She was happier than she would have been if she were with a woman she wasn't interested in. She was not interested in settling; not after knowing what love—great, extraordinary love—felt like.

She was okay. She was happy. She was happy with just learning to love herself again.

She was happy with just being a mom and helping Callie with her project.

She was happy with the small pleasures. She was happy.

* * *

"Sorry I'm late!" Callie apologized as she rushed into the room. "Surgery went long."

"Don't be sorry," Arizona smiled. "I just started without you."

"Great," Callie grinned back. "How's it feeling? Any different?"

Arizona made a face. "Not really." And it didn't. It still felt like she was heaving a long, leg-shaped piece of metal every time she moved. She sighed. "Callie?"

"Hmm?" Callie asked, coming closer to her.

"It's just...it's really heavy. I think it's too heavy for it to ever feel like a normal leg. It's just uncomfortable."

Callie knit her eyebrows together, eyeing the device. "It's only seventeen pounds, and your other leg is twenty-two."

Arizona sat down, happy to give her body a break. "Maybe I just need to suck it up, but it's been a few weeks and..."

Callie shook her head. "No. If it feels wrong, then it's wrong. I'm just wondering why Dan—the cop—didn't have any trouble with his carbon fiber prosthesis. That was even heavier, and it seemed to work well."

Arizona shrugged. "He's a police officer; he's probably a lot stronger." She smirked. "You know that I've never been much of an athlete, and I really don't seem to be doing much running these days."

Callie smiled, then asked, "So you don't think you could...use this in your daily life? Is it too heavy to run with?"

Arizona nodded. "I can hardly walk with it."

Callie narrowed her eyes at her ex-wife. "You should have told me how uncomfortable it was. You shouldn't have had to suffer in silence."

"I thought it would get better!" Arizona defended.

Callie sighed. "Okay. This is part of the process. Sometimes, things don't work. We'll just have to find another medium to make it out of."

"We have to start over?" Arizona pouted.

"Not entirely," Callie quickly assured her. "No more surgery. Just a new leg. I'll have to do some research..."

"Sorry," Arizona apologized. She felt awful that Callie's grand plan hadn't worked and that she had to start all over.

"Don't be. You go party with Karev and Wilson. I'll see you at home."

* * *

By the time Callie and Sofia were finally on the way out of the hospital, it was already almost nine o'clock.

As she walked past Webber and towards the exit, he stopped her with a, "Torres, I heard you're living with Dr. Robbins again. How is she?"

"She's doing well," Callie answered cautiously, stopping in her tracks. "Why? What's up?"

"I was just curious about whether she talks to you about her new specialty? I imagine that she must be happy with it."

"I think she is," Callie replied genuinely. "Why?"

"I just...I suggested that she would be an excellent chief, and she said she wasn't interested."

Callie raised her eyebrows. "She did? Why would she say that?"

Webber shrugged. "She said she was busy with other projects. I assumed that they were related to fetal surgery."

The chief took in Callie's troubled expression and immediately realized that he had said too much. "I mean, I don't know..."

Callie shook her head. "It's fine. She is actually pretty busy right now. But I agree that she'd make a great chief."

* * *

Arizona was tiptoeing through the dark, desolate living room, making her way towards her room when she heard a quiet "Hey" from a few yards away.

"AHHH!" she screamed in surprise, quickly jumping back and then losing her balance and falling to the floor.

Callie flicked on the lamp and then rushed towards her. " Are you okay?!"

Arizona looked up at her and scowled. "Don't _do_ that to people!"

"I'm sorry!" The current situation had not been the outcome Callie had been hoping for. All she wanted was to have a short, honest conversation with Arizona about what she had learned from Webber. "Here," she held out her hands to help, but the blonde shook her head and got up on her own.

"What are you doing?" Arizona demanded once she had dusted herself off.

"I want to talk to you."

Arizona looked at her testingly. "At midnight?"

Callie cringed. "Please? Just for a minute."

Arizona nodded once, conceding, and they both walked towards the couch.

Before Callie could lose her nerve, she asked, "Did you turn down the chief job so that you'd have time to help me with my project?

"Technically, you're helping me," Arizona clarified tipsily, effectively dodging the question.

Callie crossed her arms. "We both know that that's only part of it."

Arizona visibly deflated, slumping her shoulders. In a quiet voice, she claimed, "I don't want to be chief right now, anyway."

"Arizona," Callie murmured. "I don't want you to give up an opportunity again because of me. I don't want...an Africa re-do where you resent me."

Arizona sat down beside Callie on the couch, shaking her head indignantly. "This isn't an Africa re-do. I didn't resent you. I made the decision to come back and be with you, and I've always stood by it. If I hadn't, I wouldn't have gotten to marry you, and I wouldn't have had gotten to love Sofia. I knew my priorities when I came back."

Callie swallowed the nervous lump in her throat. Arizona was saying that _she_ had been more important than the job. _She_ had been the priority. "And now?"

Arizona sighed. "Things are different...but I still have similar priorities. I still stand by my decision to decline Webber's invitation. Why would I want to be chief when I could instead get to work closely with a world renowned orthopedic surgeon like you?" she smiled dazzlingly at Callie.

At that, Callie couldn't help but grin back. She wanted to ask something. She knew that she shouldn't, but she wanted to know the answer. She needed to know the answer. Carefully, she asked, "But are you sure? Are you sure that you have the right priorities?"

Arizona inspected Callie's face, quickly deciding whether or not to respond honestly. Finally, honesty won out.

"I've never been more sure."

* * *

 **Okay, so I've literally tried to make sense of Arizona's cheating in every possible scenario, and here's a new one. If you don't like the interpretation, then sorry, and there are different ones in a few Missing Moments chapters.**

 **Also! As you may be able to see by now, I'm working on getting C and A to a place where they can truly love each other again, because I don't think they're there yet on the show, as far as we've seen.**

 **Thanks so much for reading! And please let me know what you think!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary:**

 **The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again.**

 **When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. When people are in pain, they sometimes go directly to the source of what hurt them, hoping that this time will be different.**

 **Hoping that they'll be stronger. Better. Smarter. Kinder.**

 **Better equipped to work through the pain and to be happy.**

 **Stronger to prevent the next injury.**

 **Sometimes, it's only wishful thinking.**

 **And, other times,** **it works.**

* * *

"Good morning!" Callie called out as a half-asleep Arizona shuffled into the kitchen.

"Morning, Mommy!" Sofia called from where she was standing up on a chair beside the stove.

"Morning," Arizona yawned. "What are you two up to?"

"Making pancakes!" Sofia explained. "I'm flipping them!"

"You _are_?" Arizona asked.

"She is," Callie proudly tousled Sofia's thick hair and then turned to wink at Arizona. "You want some?"

Arizona shrugged. "Only if you have enough batter."

Callie smiled. "Of course we do," she turned to Sofia. "Sof, those two are for you, okay? Then I'll make some for Mommy and I."

Sofia nodded amicably, then carefully clutched the spatula in both hands and flipped a pancake. "I did it!" she exclaimed.

"You did!" Arizona complimented. "Can you do it again?"

With her tongue caught between her teeth in concentration, Sofia carefully flipped the other pancake, revealing that it was perfectly golden-brown on the other side.

"Yay!" Arizona cheered.

"Good job, girl," Callie chuckled. "Go sit down. I'll put them on a plate as soon as they're done cooking and bring them over to you." She turned and looked at Arizona. "You can go sit, too."

Arizona eyes widened. "You don't need help with anything?"

Callie shook her head, still smiling. "I'm good. You can test my pancakes and see if they're as good as you remember."

Arizona rolled her eyes, but inside, she had to admit that Callie's pancakes were good. She would always add just a teaspoon of cinnamon to the batter, but its spicy sweetness made all the difference.

"So," she conversed casually, as she watched Sofia drown her breakfast in maple syrup, "When do you think we'll get back to the project?"

Callie felt her lips set into a frown. In truth, she had no idea when they'd be able to make progress. She'd been contacting prostheses manufacturers, calling fellow orthopedic specialists, and wracking her brain for ideas on building a better prosthetic limb. "No idea," she huffed. "I have the day off, and I'm determined to have a plan by the time you get home tonight." She eyed Arizona. "So don't hurry home."

Arizona smiled, endeared by Callie's stubbornness and determination. "You will come up with a plan," she concurred, believing in her ex-wife and her abilities. "I know you will."

At hearing Arizona's words, Callie felt a sort of intensity fill the room. One she'd become accustomed to over the course of the past few weeks, but one that continued to feel overwhelming. It just felt like something had shifted between them. While the air used to be filled with a thick fog of pain and misunderstanding, it had subsided, and a pleasant camaraderie and sense of mutual understanding had taken its place.

It was strange, though. With all that pain gone, with so much change, Callie couldn't seem to get a read on her feelings. When she had ended things between them, she had thought that Arizona had stopped loving her: that her then-wife had wanted out of the marriage, but she hadn't wanted to be the one to end it.

So Callie had. Because leaving was better than being stuck with someone who felt stuck.

But, in the past six weeks, Callie could see that Arizona _did_ love her. Maybe not in the same way she once had—Callie wasn't sure—but in an overwhelmingly big, almost selfless kind of way.

It was a revelation to Callie, who had spent a fair number of sleepless nights wondering what had happened between them, where she'd gone wrong, why Arizona had stopped loving her.

A lot had happened, sure, but it had all caused their marriage to be too hard—leaving them both at a loss as to how to repair it.

Nothing had ever caused Arizona's love for Callie to fade, the brunette realized now, and that was comforting: like the sun coming out after a month of overcast days.

Comforting and strange. Because where did that leave them?

"Your pancakes," Callie set a plate in front of Arizona, who looked at the pancakes with craving.

"Thank you, Callie. They look amazing," Arizona complimented.

Callie blushed humbly. "I aim to please."

The three of them sat at the dining room table together, talking and laughing comfortably, until Arizona finally (and regretfully) had to leave for work.

And anyone who was watching the scene unfold would have thought they were a happy, united family.

* * *

That afternoon, between calling worldwide specialists and entertaining Sofia, Callie heard her phone buzz and quickly checked her texts.

 **Hey. Want to do something today/tonight?**

It was her girlfriend. And though Callie would usually be excited to spend the day or evening with her, on that day, she found that she felt more inclined to do research and eat dinner at home.

 _I have the day off, but I'm still doing work:(_ Callie apologized. _Soon?_

 **Soon!** the woman confirmed. **I'm excited to hear about your project :)**

 _I'm excited to tell you about it!_

And she was. But first, she needed to actually figure out how to make her project actually happen. And, somehow, that seemed more important than spending time with the woman she was seeing.

Which was wrong. Maybe. But Callie was just trying to listen to her heart, and that's what her heart was saying.

* * *

"Dr. Robbins!" Richard Webber caught sight of the younger doctor on her way towards the hospital's exit and quickly ran over to meet her.

"Chief. Hi," Arizona smiled in good spirits.

"Hi," the man greeted once he reached her. "I just caught wind of your outstanding work in surgery today; from what Karev and Bailey told me, it sounds like you lead the troops to victory."

Arizona grinned, humbly replying, "I had a lot of help."

"Maybe so. But your hard work and leadership never cease to amaze me. Are you still certain that you don't want to try for chief right now?"

She nodded. "It's just not the right time. I have bigger priorities."

Webber sighed in acceptance. "Well, I thought it was worth one last shot. Again, congratulations on the surgery, and have a wonderful night."

"Thank you, sir. You, too."

* * *

Still on cloud nine after her successful day, Arizona excitedly bounded into the living room as soon as she got home, plopping down on the couch beside Callie. "Hi."

"Hi," Callie smiled tiredly. "Good day?"

Arizona nodded, pulling a Polaroid picture out of her purse and handing it to the brunette.

"What's this?" Callie asked, staring at the picture. It was of a newborn baby and a white-faced but overjoyed-looking woman lying down in a hospital bed.

Arizona scooted closer, pointing out, "That's Karen, and the baby's Titan."

"They're cute," Callie commented, not sure why the photograph was relevant.

"I saved them," Arizona explained, the look of sheer joy never leaving her eyes.

Callie raised her eyebrows, then sat back on the couch, preparing herself to listen. "Tell me."

Appreciating her ex-wife's interest, Arizona began, "The woman had placenta percreta, a really dangerous condition with a tendency for severe hemorrhaging. I delivered Titan today at thirty four weeks, and I did the C-section, got the baby out, and got Alex ventilating him." She paused, gathering her breath. "Then, Karen was bleeding out—she was dying!—so I had to perform a hysterectomy to save her and then have Bailey excise and reconstruct the bladder."

"Wow," Callie's jaw dropped. It had clearly been a major surgery, and a hard one at that.

"I know," Arizona grinned. "But she made it. They both did. And, a few years ago, I was in the very same situation when I was Herman's fellow, and I couldn't save the mom then. But, this time, I did!"

"That's amazing!" Callie complimented. "That's...wow. That's incredible."

Arizona smiled, exhaling contently. It had been a good day. "How are you?" she asked in return. "Any progress?"

"I don't want to talk about it," Callie grumbled, her mood automatically darkening.

Arizona eyed her. "Come on, it can't be _that_ bad."

"Oh, it is," Callie assured her curtly. "Worse." She looked down at her pile of useless research and medical journals. It was hopeless.

Arizona sighed, attempting to think of a way to ameliorate her ex-wife's mood, then began, "Do you know why I first fell in love with you?"

Callie looked up in surprise, meeting intense cerulean eyes.

"Because of how much you _care,_ " Arizona finished. "Before I approached you, I kept hearing these stories from nurses and surgeons about how much you did for your patients. One nurse told me about how you always followed up with former patients a week, a month, and a year later, just to see how they were doing. Do you still do that?"

Callie shrugged, embarrassed and strangely touched by her ex-wife's words.

"Callie, you care more than anyone, and I've always admired that about you."

"Really?" the air in the room made Callie feel naked—skinless—as if her bones and nerves were on display.

Arizona nodded sincerely. "Really. I've just...always felt like I somehow had to protect my heart. But you're not afraid of showing yours."

"Maybe I should be," Callie joked lightly, attempting to lighten the weight of the conversation.

Arizona shook her head in complete seriousness. "No. It's partially why you're such an incredible doctor. You're so determined to help people that you don't give up until you find a way to do so. You're so determined to help the Wounded Warriors get back to what they love—to defending our country—that you'll figure out a way for them to. You'll figure out a new plan for a lighter, better prosthesis, and then you'll change hundreds of lives; I know you will."

Callie nodded, opting to believe Arizona's sincere words. "Okay."

Arizona dimpled at her, echoing, "'Okay,' rock star."

At Arizona's kind, reassuring words and complete faith in her, Callie felt her entire body hum in what could only be described as pure, unalloyed joy. She felt a grin take over her face.

Out of all the smart, passionate, _strong_ Wounded Warriors she'd met—without a doubt—Arizona was her favorite.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary:**

 **The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again.**

 **When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. When people are in pain, they sometimes go directly to the source of what hurt them, hoping that this time will be different.**

 **Hoping that they'll be stronger. Better. Smarter. Kinder.**

 **Better equipped to work through the pain and to be happy.**

 **Stronger to prevent the next injury.**

 **Sometimes, it's only wishful thinking.**

 **And, other times,** **it works.**

* * *

"So I'm still figuring out the next step," Callie informed Arizona as they walked side by side down the hallway in the pediatrics ward.

"I don't need to be in the lab, then?" Arizona asked.

Callie shook her head. "Nope. Just me."

"Dr. Robbins," a nurse who had been walking in the opposite direction paused in front of them.

"Carmen. Hi," Arizona smiled.

"Hi. I just wanted to say that your hair looks gorgeous today."

Callie raised her eyebrows.

"Thank you!" Arizona exclaimed, oblivious to the fact that she was being hit on. She turned back to her ex-wife. "Callie, this is Carmen Ramos. She's a new nurse in the pediatric ICU. The youngest at Grey Sloan," Arizona smiled proudly, and the young woman grinned back.

"I'm only twenty-two. Fresh out of nursing school," she offered to Callie. "Anyway," she began, turning back to Arizona and giving her _the look_ , eyeing her up and down, "I was hoping that I might be able to take you to dinner; it would give me a chance to learn more about Peds and how you run things here."

Arizona nodded enthusiastically, honored by the young nurse's interest in her department.

Beside her, Callie suddenly felt her temperature rise.

It wasn't that she was jealous. She had no reason to be jealous.

Maybe the heater had just been turned on. Or maybe she was coming down with something.

"I'd love that! We'll have to find a time when we're both free."

"Great," Carmen gushed. "I really, really look forward to it."

As soon as the young, overzealous woman walked away, Callie turned to Arizona. "Don't tell me that you're _actually_ going on a date with that girl."

"A date?!" Arizona asked. What was Callie talking about?

"That was her asking you out. Didn't you notice the way she looked at you?"

Arizona raised her eyebrows. "No..."

"Well, it was creepy," Callie explained inarticulately. "She was picturing you naked."

"Hmm," Arizona commented.

Callie frowned. Was Arizona actually...considering the offer? "Are you going to go?"

Arizona shrugged. She wasn't opposed to being wine and dined, but she had no interest in actually sleeping with or dating Carmen. Mindless sex and casual dating just...wasn't a priority. "Maybe. But only to educate her about my Peds ward," she continued walking, throwing a smile over her shoulder for her ex-wife. "See you tonight, Cal."

Callie looked after the blonde, feeling defeated. She knew that it wasn't her business or place to care about Arizona's dating life, but somehow, she still hated the idea of her ex being with anyone else. It wasn't fair, she knew, because she herself was dating someone somewhat seriously, but she couldn't help how she felt.

Callie knew that it was only right for her ex-wife to move on from her entirely, but the thought of no longer seeing Arizona at home or laughing with her at work made Callie feel sick to her stomach.

Which meant something. She knew that it meant something. She just wasn't ready to think about it beyond that realization.

Not yet.

* * *

That evening, Callie walked through the door just as Arizona and Sofia were serving dinner.

"Mommy!" Sofia cheered.

"Hey!" Arizona grinned, serving Sofia some of the avocado and arugula salad. "You're just in time for dinner!"

Callie smiled. "Actually, I'm going out. It looks yummy, though. Did you help, Sof?"

Sofia nodded enthusiastically. "I cut the avo."

Callie smiled. "Nice. That's _awesome_." Since Arizona had moved in with them, she had noticed that she had begun using words like "awesome" and "yay" far more than she would have otherwise. And, while normally she might have rolled her eyes at her blatant gusto, she found that she didn't mind the perkiness. Every time she'd use one of her ex-wife's signature enthusiastic words, they'd make her think of Arizona. And she liked that.

"Where are you going?" Arizona asked curiously.

Callie shrugged noncommittally. "She said it's the best restaurant in Seattle. That's all I know."

"French?" Arizona felt a sense of déjà vu jolt through her.

Callie's mouth fell open as she looked into Arizona's carefully composed face. She cringed, replying with a neutral, "I'm not sure."

Arizona nodded.

"I'm, um," Callie awkwardly began walking towards her room. "I'm going to change."

Desperate to escape the awkwardness of Arizona's perfect composure, Callie hurried down the hallway and into her bedroom, throwing her purse onto the bed and quickly changing into a short black dress and heels. Satisfied that her makeup from that morning still looked okay, she grabbed her bag, making her way back towards the kitchen.

"Well, I'm off," she began as she walked into the room. "I will see you two in the morning." Slowly, she brought her eyes up to meet the blonde's.

Arizona's eyes were wide and expressive as they ran over Callie's body. "You look..." she cleared her throat. "Really pretty."

"Thanks," Callie responded tightly. She felt a sense of déjà vu jolt through her. "Anyway, I'm gonna go."

Arizona smiled sadly, unable to completely hide the fact that Callie's plans upset her. "Have fun. Be safe."

* * *

A few nights later, Callie was doing research for her project when Arizona got home.

Callie looked up from her laptop and smiled at the blonde. "Hey. You up for some pizza?"

" _Yes_ ," Arizona sighed. "Where's Sofia?"

"Sleeping over at Loren's," Callie explained. "It's just you and me." She took out her cell phone to call for pizza delivery, and Arizona walked towards her room, ready to put on pajamas and unwind. It had been a stressful week, and she needed to settle down and find a way to alleviate that stress.

When she walked back into the living room, Callie turned to her and said, "The pizza will be here in twenty minutes."

"Great," Arizona plopped down onto the couch beside her. "I'm surprised you didn't want to go out with your girlfriend tonight," she offered, perhaps a little passive aggressively.

Callie shrugged. "I wasn't in the mood." And she hadn't been. She enjoyed nights in, innocently talking and laughing with Arizona. Even without that, she needed to make thinking about her project her first priority. After a minute of introspective thought, she asked, "Arizona?"

Arizona raised her eyebrows, encouraging Callie to continue.

"Were you ever...jealous? Like, when you saw me with Heather? I know you said you were just worried, but were you jealous, at all?"

Arizona's eyes widened, and she shook her head.

"Never?" Callie questioned, and Arizona almost felt like she heard disappointment in her ex-wife's voice. "I mean, it's just that, historically..."

Giving in, she exhaled, "Of course I was."

"Why didn't you...show it? I thought..."

"I wasn't supposed to be!" Arizona explained. "We weren't together, and..."

Callie waited for her ex-wife to continue.

Arizona sighed, surrendering, "Callie, you know that I can be a...jealous person. But do you remember the last time I was...outwardly jealous?"

Callie shook her head. "No."

"I almost killed you and Sofia."

That time, it was Callie's eyes that widened in surprise. She breathed out an "Oh" as the situation suddenly made sense.

Arizona looked down.

"That wasn't your fault."

Arizona rolled her eyes, but she smiled kindly at Callie. "Well, I'm not going to blame you, and I'm definitely not going to blame Mark, so..." she paused, allowing Callie to mentally finish the syllogism. Then, she continued, "But it doesn't matter, because it's wrong for me to feel jealous now, anyway, right?"

Callie met Arizona's eyes for a long moment before agreeing, "Right." But the word sounded unconvincing, even to her.

* * *

When the pizza came, the two women ate together as Callie updated Arizona on her progress.

"So, we're going to 3-D print the model using titanium instead of aluminum, and I'm still figuring out a way to make it as light as it can possibly be," Callie explained.

"A 3-D printed leg?" Arizona asked in awe.

Callie nodded. "It'll be the first time that someone's tried that. If it works, we may just go down in medical history."

"You will, regardless," Arizona smiled.

"So will you," Callie promised. "Anyway, how's your week going? I feel like we've barely seen each other."

"I know," Arizona frowned. "It's been exhausting. Actually, I should probably get to bed."

Callie nodded. "Sure. Go sleep. I'm going to keep thinking. I'll do the dishes."

"Thank you. And thank you for the pizza."

Callie grinned. "Like old times."

Arizona shuffled into her room, closing the door behind her, and Callie went back to sketching out potential working prostheses. A few minutes later, inspiration struck.

"Arizona!" Callie called from the living room. "Arizona, I've got it!" It was late, but they had only said goodnight a few minutes before, so she hurried towards the guest room to share the good news.

As soon as she pushed open the door, however, her eyes widened and she temporarily found herself unable to speak.

With her prosthetic off, Arizona was sitting up in bed, attempting to look effortlessly relaxed as she leaned back on one arm. The flush in her cheeks and the shakiness in her movements, however, indicated that she hadn't been trying to sleep. Callie had nearly walked in on something far more personal and intimate than that.

And, as Callie imagined what Arizona had been doing before she had opened the door, she felt her blood pool in her center and her face grow hot. "Oh," she breathed. "Were you...?"

Arizona felt her entire body blush lobster red. "You had something to tell me?" she quickly changed the subject, trying to slow her breathing. Talking to her ex-wife about how she had just been masturbating after a long workday felt wrong. Way wrong.

"It's, um," suddenly, Callie couldn't remember what she had come in for. "I'll just tell you tomorrow."

"Callie," Arizona eyed her testily. "You've already interrupted," she smirked. "Tell me what you were going to say."

Callie winced at herself one last time, then offered enthusiastically, "I know how to build your prosthesis. I'll, um, explain my idea in detail tomorrow." And as quickly and as effectively as she could, she bumbled out of the room, closing the door behind her.

Late that night, unable to sleep with images flooding her mind of her ex-wife breathing heavily and moaning soundlessly before Callie had stormed in, she finalized her plan.

She finalized her plan to make the best prosthesis that Arizona had ever known.

* * *

 **Thanks for reading! Progress is being made. Yay! Leave reviews/comments/questions please and thank you!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary:**

 **The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again.**

 **When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. When people are in pain, they sometimes go directly to the source of what hurt them, hoping that this time will be different.**

 **Hoping that they'll be stronger. Better. Smarter. Kinder.**

 **Better equipped to work through the pain and to be happy.**

 **Stronger to prevent the next injury.**

 **Sometimes, it's only wishful thinking.**

 **And, other times,** **it works.**

* * *

Sitting in Sofia's bed, snuggled up against each other, Arizona asked, "Hey, Sof, you know how your friend Thompson was talking about superheroes at school this morning?"

Sofia nodded. "His favowite is Spiderman."

"Spiderman's cool. But I know of an even _cooler_ superhero."

Sofia looked up in surprise. Who could be cooler than Spiderman? "Who?"

"Guess," Arizona teased.

"Mama..." Sofia whined.

"Fine, I'll give you a hint," Arizona giggled. "She looks just like you."

"Mommy?" Sofia guessed.

"Mmm hmm," Arizona nodded enthusiastically. "You know why?"

Sofia shook her head.

Callie, who had been folding laundry in the other room, walked towards Sof's to put some clothes away and paused at the door. Obscured from view, she curiously listened to what her daughter and ex-wife were talking about.

"Well," Arizona began, "She is not only a supermom, but she is also a superdoctor. Some people can't walk, but she can fix their legs so that they can. She's also building me a robot leg."

Callie had always adored watching Arizona interact with Sofia, but she'd never heard the blonde talk about _her_ to their daughter. That, she realized, she adored more.

Sofia's mouth fell open. "Really?!"

Arizona grinned. "Yup. It's going to be super awesome."

"Can I have one?!"

From behind the door, Callie tried to silence the laugh bubbling up inside her.

"No, silly!" Arizona giggled. "You already have two legs."

"Oh, yeah," the little girl conceded, suddenly disappointed. She wanted a robot leg like her mom.

"Anyway," Arizona continued, "She's really special. Do you know who else is special?"

"Who?" Sofia asked curiously.

"You," Arizona responded solemnly, leaning down to kiss Sof's head.

Sofia giggled happily, snuggling deeper into her. " _You're_ special, Mama."

Unable to stand being a third party to the cuteness any longer, Callie knocked on the door, setting Sofia's clothes on her dresser. "Hey!" she pouted. "You give Mama goodnight hugs but not me?"

Sofia shyly burrowed her face into Arizona's chest, and the blonde smiled, whispering in her ear, "Can you go give Mommy the Superhero a hug for me?"

Grinning, Sofia nodded, scrambling off her bed and rushing towards Callie's waiting arms.

Callie picked her up as soon as little arms wrapped around her neck, cooing, "That's my baby girl."

"I'm a big girl," Sofia pouted.

"A big girl who needs her sleep," Arizona maintained, pulling back the covers so that Callie could set her down in bed.

Callie expertly tucked her in, pulling the blankets up to her chin. "Goodnight, sweetie," she leaned down and kissed the middle of her forehead.

"'Night, Mommy."

Callie headed towards the door, giving Arizona privacy; it was the blonde's night with Sof, after all.

"I love you, Sof," Arizona whispered, leaning down and kissing her forehead on the exact spot that Callie's lips had just been. "Sleep tight."

"Don't let the bed bugs bite!" Sofia called after her.

Arizona chuckled. "'Night, you little bug."

As she closed Sofia's bedroom door behind her, Arizona caught sight of Callie lurking several feet away. "You shouldn't eavesdrop," she chided.

Callie smiled, unconcerned. "I know. But I'm glad I did."

* * *

"So, we're back," Arizona commented as Callie opened the door to the lab.

"Back in business," Callie agreed, letting the door shut behind them.

"So..." Arizona began, attempting to the curb the incessant curiosity in her voice. "What's the plan?"

"The plan is going to sound insane," Callie warned her.

Sitting down, Arizona insisted, "It won't. I'm sure it's brilliant."

"It's only brilliant if it works," Callie reminded her. And, man, she hoped it would work. "Okay, as you know, the surgery recreated sensory and motor pathways in your leg, and that will hopefully allow you to feel a sense of vibration and proprioception when wearing the prosthesis."

"A lighter prosthesis," Arizona added.

"Yes."

"Well..." Arizona excitedly urged Callie on. "Tell me about this new prosthesis plan!"

Callie grinned. "Okay. So, to reduce its weight, the limb will be hollowed out, forming an exoskeleton. The model will be sent to a 3-D printer and printed out of titanium. Then, on top of that, we'll print the thinnest top layer of the prosthesis—maybe a quarter of a centimeter thick—and that mirrors your skin. Then, the finishing touches will be securely assembled using a standard pyramid connector. And then we're done."

Arizona's eyebrows were practically touching her hairline. "So that's it?" she asked sarcastically.

"That's it," Callie joked back. "And then, of course, you'll have to practice using it. But eventually, when you have a natural thought about moving your missing leg, you'll contract the muscle and the signals will be translated into messages for the prosthesis. And—as the remapped nerves grow deeper—you should be able to feel some sensation. It'll function just like your right leg. Hopefully."

Forcing herself to stop talking to avoid overwhelming the blonde, Callie looked up and into Arizona's endlessly deep cerulean blue eyes trained on her. "What?" she asked self-consciously.

Arizona knew her Callie was asking why she was staring at her the way she was, but what was Arizona supposed to say? _I'm immeasurably in love with you? I'm forever in awe of you? You're the most amazing woman I've ever known?_

No. She should have said _That's awesome_ or _This is really great_. Instead, what came out was a potentially innocent, "Nothing. I just...I find you miraculous."

Callie blushed visibly. "Even if this whole project flops?"

Arizona nodded sincerely. "Even then. But we can do this. We will."

Callie smiled. "Then, you want to start? I can take measurements for your prosthesis right now."

Arizona smiled back. "Let's do it." She was ready to make progress. She was ready to see if Callie's project would be successful. Because if it was, then the triumph would be even sweeter with Callie feeling it right beside her. And if it wasn't, then it would be okay, because they would go through it together.

As Callie began to take Arizona's measurements for her new prosthesis, she thought about what may come from the project. If it were successful, then she'd be over the moon with happiness and a sense of accomplishment. And if it failed, she would be devastated—but having Arizona beside her would help. It would help because they'd feel disappointment together. And it would hurt, knowing that she failed her ex-wife again.

Good or bad, Arizona would always make everything _more_.

* * *

"Oh, you're home!" Arizona exclaimed as Callie walked in.

"Yeah," Callie exhaled, setting down her things. "Surgery ended a little early."

"Perfect," Arizona smiled. "Go sit, read a book, get changed. Dinner will be ready in a few minutes." She turned to Sofia, who was meticulously cutting vegetables at the counter. "Right, Sof?"

"Right," Sofia grinned.

"You don't need any help?"

Arizona shook her head. "Nope. _We_ are making _you_ dinner."

"You don't have to do that..." Callie began.

Arizona's happy demeanor faltered slightly. "Well, you've been super busy working on your project—something you're doing for me, by the way."

"I don't mind doing it," Callie defended.

"I know," Arizona smiled. "Just like Sof and I don't mind making dinner for you."

Callie smiled back, flushing, pleased with her ex-wife's thoughtful action.

"So, go," Arizona insisted. "Do something fun. We'll call you when it's ready."

A few minutes later, Sofia ran into her mom's room. "Mommy! Dinner!"

"What'd you make me?!" Callie asked.

Skipping back towards the kitchen with Callie following behind her, Sofia said, "Mama made chicken and rice and broccoli, and I made salad! She got ice cream for dessert!"

"Ice cream?! I love ice cream!" Callie exclaimed.

"We know," Arizona grinned, setting all the dishes on the table.

"Thank you for this," Callie smiled thankfully.

"Of course," Arizona waved her off. "So...is my leg ready?"

"It is, actually!" Callie exclaimed as she served herself. "You want to try it out tomorrow?"

Arizona nodded enthusiastically. "I do."

* * *

A few days later, a meeting took place with all the attendings.

"Alright, everyone but the department heads are excused. Everyone, be sure that you're hydrated, well-rested, and ready to go into surgery at any time. It's a rainy day, and there likely will be accidents," Chief Webber advised.

The majority of the doctors cleared the conference room, leaving a chorus of "yes sir's" and "thank you's" in their wake. When only the present department heads remained, he informed them, "As it turns out, there is an additional two million dollars in the hospital's budget that went unused this year. And, as I have in the past, I would like to give you all an opportunity to make a presentation to me convincing me that your department deserves the money. The winner will receive the two million additional dollars. You have until eight o'clock tonight to talk with me and present your argument."

Before he had even finished speaking, a loud, excited buzz filled the room. Webber knew better than anyone that surgeons thrived on competition, and the department heads were instantly up for the challenge.

Maggie raised her hand. "How will you decide on the winner?"

Webber shrugged. "It depends on a number of factors. But, ultimately, the decision is based on what department sounds like it will best use the money."

Maggie nodded solemnly, the wheels in her head already turning.

"Any other questions?" Webber opened up the floor.

Callie raised her hand. "Will you keep the history of our previous presentations in mind?" she cringed, thinking of the time she went on a rant about her relationship insecurities several years before.

He shook his head. "No. Clean slate for everyone, I'm judging you solely on the basis of your upcoming presentation and department plans."

Callie nodded in understanding, breathing a sigh of relief.

From across the table, Arizona eyed her. When she considered how the other departments might use an additional two million dollars, she thought that—at that point in her career—Callie would use it best. Callie, and by extension, her department, deserved it most—even more so than her own, perhaps.

Which was a strange realization, especially given her typical competitive nature.

Still, the idea of Callie getting this win—the idea of her happiness—filled Arizona's chest with warmth she wanted to hold onto forever.

In that moment, Arizona decided to ensure that her ex-wife won the competition.

* * *

"Hunt," Arizona flirted. "How've you been?"

Owen looked towards her, a question shrouding his pale blue eyes. He and Arizona had always been friendly—they'd practically lived together with Callie and Cristina, for a while—and yet they wouldn't quite consider each other friends.

So it was odd that Arizona had asked how he'd been. "I'm doing well," he responded politely. "Are you ready for your presentation to the Chief?"

Arizona's smile faltered slightly as her nervousness kicked in. "Actually, I was hoping to talk to you about that."

Owen turned his body to face her completely; he was all ears. "What about it?"

"Ortho deserves the money," she quickly said.

"What?" Owen laughed.

"Hear me out!" she insisted. "All I'm asking is that you don't meet with the Chief. Pretend you had surgery or you forgot or something. Just keep the budget you have now."

"Um..." he looked around the room, still not entirely convinced that he wasn't being pranked.

"Please?" Arizona pleaded. "I'll owe you. I'll totally owe you."

"You going to give me two million dollars?" he joked.

"No," Arizona looked down. "But anything else. I'll cover your shifts? Get you the best seats at a Seahawks game? Buy your lunch?"

Owen chuckled slightly at the Peds surgeon's obvious desperation. "Why?" he asked. "Just tell me why."

Arizona sighed. She didn't know why. She didn't know how to say why. She just felt like it was something she needed to do. Weakly, she explained, "It's Callie." That was all she knew.

But Owen understood. Of course he understood. He had loved Cristina, and she had loved Callie. It was how it had always been. "Okay."

He looked up at the OR board, where he was scheduled to help Amelia perform a meningioma—purely for practice's sake. It was a twelve hour surgery set to begin at nine o'clock that night. Casually, he strode up to the board, taking a washable marker from out of his coat pocket and changing the surgery to begin at ten that morning instead. "I better go tell Dr. Shepherd that we have surgery in," he looked down at his watch, "Twenty minutes." He grinned at Arizona. He would also need to secure an OR, an entire staff, and alert the patient, but he was determined to help Arizona fight for the woman he loved.

He had been there before. He'd be there again, he was sure.

"Thank you," Arizona mouthed in sincere appreciation. Owen had not only backed out of the competition, but he had also taken Amelia out with him.

Owen nodded. "Good luck with the rest of 'em."

* * *

The current Head of General Surgery was at a conference, thankfully, so he wouldn't be an issue.

Maggie Pierce, however, would be.

"Pierce!" Arizona called, walking towards the younger surgeon.

"Arizona. Hi," the woman smiled. "Have you made your presentation for the Chief yet?"

Arizona shook her head. "I'm not going to."

Maggie knit her eyebrows together. "What? Why? It's for two million dollars!"

"I know," Arizona conceded. "But I think Ortho should get it."

Maggie crossed her arms. "You do, do you? I think Cardio should get it."

Arizona sighed. Convincing Maggie may have been a little harder than she had originally anticipated. "Look," she began, "Callie deserves this. She really, really deserves it. I'm just...I'm asking for you to not meet with Webber about your proposal. Just give this one to Callie."

"Seriously?" Maggie raised her eyebrows. "Aren't you, like, super competitive? Because I am."

"Yeah," Arizona blushed. "But Cardio already has a huge budget, and..." she shook her head, unable to think of a fair trade. "I'll owe you."

"Are you trying to win her back?" Maggie asked frankly.

"No!" Arizona instantly argued. She wasn't. She respected her ex-wife's current relationship. It wasn't that. It was just that...the idea of making Callie happy made her happy. "I'm not. She's dating someone."

"But you love her." Maggie, though a little socially awkward by nature, had always been good at reading people. She was an observer, and she'd observed Arizona and Callie on numerous occasions. She knew what love looked like.

"We were married...once," Arizona explained weakly. It wasn't a confirmation, but it wasn't a denial, either.

"Okay," Maggie agreed. "I'm in."

Arizona felt a relieved and euphoric smile overtake her face.

"But you owe me brownies," Maggie insisted, as harshly as she could.

"Yes, sir," Arizona replied to the harsh voice out of habit. For a moment, Maggie had managed to remind her of her father. "And...could you maybe enlist Jackson's help with your patients, somehow? Keep him busy?"

Maggie nodded. "I'll do my best."

" _Thank you_ ," Arizona said appreciatively. "I owe you,"

Maggie began backing away, on her way to find Avery. "Unless you have two million dollars, brownies should suffice," she joked, throwing one last smile Arizona's way.

When she was gone, Arizona breathed a sigh of relief. She had done everything she could. Now, Callie just needed to win.

* * *

"Hey," Callie greeted, sitting down at a lunch table with Maggie, Meredith, and Alex. "Maggie, are you ready for your presentation?"

"What presentation?" Meredith asked curiously.

"For the chief," Maggie explained. "He's giving another two million to the department that will use it best."

Callie grinned giddily. "I'm great at these things. I'm going to beat all your asses."

"Pierce is the only one here up against you," Alex sassed.

Callie waved him off. "So..." she turned back to Maggie. "Are you ready? You know, the Chief can be intimidating once you get in there. When I pitched my cartilage research a few years ago, he was all ticked off because I had a typo in my table of contents."

Maggie's eyes widened. "You had a table of contents?"

"Of course," Callie insisted. She loved psyching out her competition.

Maggie shook her head, a little shocked at how serious the doctors took winning at Grey Sloan. "I'm ready," she lied. "I just hope I have time. Busy day."

"Why are you in here, eating lunch and making polite conversation, then?" Alex challenged.

Maggie kicked him beneath the table.

"OW!"

Callie jumped in surprise, looking between them. "What happened?!"

"She kicked me!"

"My leg spasmed," Maggie defended. "It happens sometimes."

Callie eyed her friend, suddenly concerned. "Do you want me to take a peek at it? That can't be good."

Maggie quickly shook her head. "It's no big deal. You should go prepare for your meeting with the Chief, anyway."

"I think I will," Callie decided. She stood up, grabbing her lunch tray. "Wish me luck," she paused. "Wait, I don't need it," she added confidently, guffawing as she headed out the cafeteria door.

After she was gone, Alex turned to Maggie. "You totally kicked me," he maintained.

* * *

At eight o'clock sharp, all of the department heads were paged to the conference room. Webber was standing at the head of the table, glaring at every surgeon who walked in.

Once everyone was there and sitting down, Callie bouncing in her seat in anticipation, Jackson muttering about Maggie giving him "interns' work," Amelia demanding to know why Owen had changed the time of her surgery, and Maggie winking at Arizona, Webber thundered, "What, were you all too _busy_ to come see me?"

Callie looked at him and confusion, then turned to her friends. "Some of you didn't make your proposal?" she asked.

"None of them did," Webber crossed his arms, answering for them.

"Can we have an extension?" Jackson asked.

"Yeah, I was in surgery all day," Amelia added.

"We were all busy, but the Chief gave us clear time parameters: 'by eight this evening.' Whoever won did so fair and square," Maggie disagreed, standing up for Arizona and therefore Callie.

"Wait..." Callie interrupted, her eyebrows drawn together. "You were _all_ busy?"

"Everyone but you," Owen shrugged, smiling.

"Wait..." Callie wasn't following. How was it that _none_ of the other doctors had managed to meet with the Chief?

"Enough," Webber insisted. "Since you're all _so busy_ ," he glared at the doctors, only skipping over Callie. "The two million dollars will be rewarded to the one department that is organized and determined to better itself. Callie Torres, congratulations, and I hope you use the additional funds wisely."

Callie widened her eyes. This was not how she had expected to win. "Wait...I win?"

The chief nodded, and Maggie, Owen, and Arizona began clapping sincerely. "Yay!"

After a moment of hesitation, Amelia and Jackson joined in, muttering their congratulations.

Callie still looked like she couldn't quite believe it. "Thanks," she blushed. "I just wish I had won it fairly."

"You did," Arizona insisted. "You would have won, anyway."

Amelia opened her mouth, ready to argue, then closed it, choosing not to engage. She knew that she should be happy for her friend. "That may be true," she conceded. Getting up, she patted Callie on the back. "Congratulations."

The rest of the doctors began getting up to follow after her, offering a few more sincere and enthusiastic words of praise.

Arizona remained seated across from her, attempting to read her ex-wife's face. Callie still looked confused and surprised, but there was definitely an undercurrent of elation.

Arizona smiled despite herself. She'd done good.

Once everyone had left, she offered, "Well, I'm going to go get Sof and head home."

Callie nodded. "I'm on-call until ten. I'll see you then?"

Arizona smiled and nodded. "Good job, Calliope," she congratulated once more. "You deserved this."

* * *

"It smells so good in here," Callie moaned when she finally got home and walked towards the kitchen.

"Thanks," Arizona said from beside the dishwasher. "I'm, um, making brownies."

"Why?" Callie chuckled. Arizona wasn't one to make brownies just because.

"For...Maggie?" Arizona offered. It was no use saying that she was 'just in the mood' because she was planning to give them all to the heart surgeon.

"Why?" Callie asked again. Now _that_ was strange. Arizona and Maggie weren't even really friends; why would Arizona bake her brownies?

Arizona shrugged, working to conceal what she'd done that day. "Just 'cause."

Callie knowingly crossed her arms. "You know, I talked to Maggie."

Arizona's eyes looked up in fear.

"She said that she was busy all day, and that's why she didn't talk to Webber," Callie began. "But I checked the OR board, and she didn't have any surgeries today. Not one."

Arizona cringed. "Maybe she had to catch up on paperwork?" she offered.

Callie glared at her. "Did you convince everyone to let me win?"

"No!" Arizona promised. "Well, not exactly."

Callie continued glaring.

"Look..." Arizona defended. "I just thought...you deserved it. You've been working so hard, and you do such ground-breaking work. So I may have told a few people that." Nervously, she met Callie's skeptical eyes, weakly adding, "You wanted to win, anyway."

"Yeah, but fairly!" Callie argued. "Winning isn't as fun if it's only because everyone else forfeited!"

"True," Arizona agreed. Then, she hopefully met Callie's eyes. "You aren't at least a little happy, though?"

"Yeah, I am," Callie conceded. "But I still don't get why you did this for me. I mean, you're the most competitive, type-A person I have ever known. This isn't really like you." And that was true. Arizona loved competition, and she loved to win. She was never one to give up an opportunity for someone else; it just wasn't in her nature. She thrived on being 'the best.' It was what she lived for.

But, then, she'd let _Callie_ be the best; in fact, it seemed that she'd insisted upon it.

Arizona exhaled heavily, attempting to think of a way to phrase her thoughts in a way that she wouldn't overstep any boundaries. She had to respect their divorce and her ex-wife's current relationship, after all. "I just wanted to make you happy," she admitted. That was true.

It was all she ever wanted.

Callie raised her eyebrows. She wasn't sure if Arizona had made the sacrifice for her because she still felt guilty for past transgressions or if Arizona still loved her—in a big, selfless kind of way. She wasn't sure if Arizona might even want to be with her, again.

In that moment, though, she knew one thing for certain:

She wanted to be with Arizona.

* * *

 **OH MAN OH MAN OH MAN. I hope you liked this chapter. I had a lot of fun with it.**

 **Thanks for reading, and leave reviews for a happy writer! (hehe)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary:**

 **The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again.**

 **When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. When people are in pain, they sometimes go directly to the source of what hurt them, hoping that this time will be different.**

 **Hoping that they'll be stronger. Better. Smarter. Kinder.**

 **Better equipped to work through the pain and to be happy.**

 **Stronger to prevent the next injury.**

 **Sometimes, it's only wishful thinking.**

 **And, other times,** **it works.**

* * *

"How's it feeling?" Callie asked nervously. "Any different? Any better?"

In concentration, Arizona continued to walk around the room, attempting to feel any sensation or connection to the prosthesis. She made a face.

She liked it. It was the lightest and most comfortable (well, _least uncomfortable_ ) prosthetic limb she'd ever used, but it still didn't feel particularly revolutionary. "I don't know."

"Okay," Callie nodded in acceptance. "That's okay. It's still kind of early." She walked to the other side of the room, on her way to go grab something. "Close your eyes," she instructed. "I want to try something."

Huffing in frustration, Arizona followed her ex-wife's orders, standing still and shutting her eyes. "What are we trying, exactly?"

"You'll see." Callie grabbed a few bowling balls located in the closet and began rolling them, two at a time towards Arizona—as hard as she could. "Okay. Open them."

Arizona opened her eyes, only to be met with two bowling balls nearly crushing her toes. "Ahh!" she jumped, effectively dodging the heavy spherical objects only to have to jump over several more rolling her way.

Callie watched Arizona's reactions carefully as she continued rolling the balls across the room, as fast and as hard as she could. Finally, when Callie got to the last two, she saw Arizona trip over one that had passed by her, falling hard onto her backside.

It wasn't even a second later that Callie was by her side. "Are you okay?!" she fretted. "I'm so sorry. Ahh. Here, let me help." She held out her hands to her ex-wife, feeling a shock run through her as Arizona gratefully took them.

As Arizona grabbed Callie's waiting hands, she felt her fingers tingle. Their hands had always fit together so perfectly. Despite that pleasant feeling, she also scowled as she stood up. "What was that about?"

Callie smiled guiltily. "It was just a little test?"

Arizona dusted her behind and couldn't help but smirk when she asked, "Did I pass?"

"Yes, actually!" Callie complimented.

Arizona crossed her arms. "How?"

"Well, you were jumping out of instinct. Would you have been able to do that with your old prosthesis?"

Arizona didn't even need a second to think about it. "No."

"Exactly," Callie grinned. "And that's not just because this one's lighter and better made. This is all you. Your brain is communicating with your prosthesis, just like it would with your leg."

Arizona's eyes widened with wonder. "It's working?!"

Callie grinned, nodding enthusiastically. "It's working!"

* * *

A few nights later, Callie decided that it was time to bite the bullet and talk to her girlfriend.

She needed to tell the woman about her new (well, newly discovered, anyway) feelings for Arizona. She needed to do what was right. Because being with someone but loving someone else most definitely wasn't.

"Hey," Callie breathed when the woman picked up her phone. "Are you free for dinner?"

"Yeah!" the woman immediately agreed. "Meet at our favorite pizza place in half an hour?"

"Perfect," Callie seconded. "I'll see you then."

As she got dressed and attempted to sneak out the door, Arizona looked up at her from where she was reading the _New York Times_ at the dining room table. "Where are you off to?" she asked curiously.

"Out," Callie replied cryptically. She didn't want to get into the details. Not yet. "I'll be back soon."

* * *

As soon as Callie sat down at the table, greeting her girlfriend with an apologetic smile even though she was early, the woman knew that what she'd predicted was true.

"You're in love with her," she stated simply, as soon as Callie took a seat across from her. It wasn't a question.

Callie sighed. She had hoped for a little warm-up before the grand finale. Perhaps some small talk. A slice of pizza. But no. "I am," she replied simply.

The woman nodded. She had assumed as much. "Does she still love you?" They both knew that she was really was asking much more than that; she was asking if something happened between them. Had Callie been faithful? Had she cheated? Was she still the woman her girlfriend thought she was?

And she was. Callie had never been a cheater, and she surely wasn't going to start now. "I don't know," Callie admitted honestly. "Maybe she does. Or maybe she's stopped. Maybe she never will."

The woman nodded in acceptance, deciding that letting Callie go gracefully was the right thing to do. She loved the brunette, after all; she just wanted her to be happy. She picked up her purse, stood up, and walked across the table to learn over and kiss Callie's cheek in parting. "She does," the woman promised. "It's impossible not to."

And then she was gone.

* * *

When Callie got home, less than forty minutes later, Arizona hadn't moved. "You're back already?" Arizona knit her eyebrows together.

"Yeah...she had something to do," Callie lied. She didn't feel like putting her heart on the line again. Not yet. What happened between them had to be up to Arizona.

"Got it," Arizona replied neutrally, secretly elated to have Callie back so soon.

Callie pulled out a chair and sat down across from her. "Sofia?"

"In her room, looking for the _Frozen_ DVD. Want to watch it with us?" Arizona grinned.

Callie groaned. "Again?! Seriously?"

Arizona laughed. "Hey, it's better than _Cinderella_ , right? There are two female protagonists and no princes with White Knight Syndrome. Do you know how rare that is for Disney? At least her favorite movie isn't one that gives a false sense of happily ever after. We both know that doesn't exist."

"I think it can," Callie pouted quietly. Maybe she and Arizona could have a happily ever after. If she ever got up the courage to tell the woman how she felt. If Arizona felt the same.

Arizona shrugged, looking away. Callie was supposed to have been her happily ever after, but she was dating someone else. "Maybe for some people." She seemed lost in thought for a moment, then turned back to her ex-wife with a bright smile. "Sooo..." she began. "Endure the stupid movie with me?"

Callie chuckled. "Fine. I'll make popcorn."

"Yay!" Arizona cheered. "I'll get Sof."

* * *

By the time Callie woke up on Sunday, Arizona and Sofia were already sitting side-by-side at the dining room table, reading the cartoons.

"Morning ladies," Callie smiled.

"Morning!" they chorused in return, looking up at her and smiling.

"We all have the day off?" Callie asked rhetorically. "It feels like a pancake day, don't you think?"

"Yes! "Pancakes!" Sofia cheered.

"I can help," Arizona laughed.

"'Kay," Callie opened the cupboard, then cringed. "Slight problem. It appears that we are out of flour."

Sofia pouted in disappointment. Her heart had been set on pancakes.

Arizona looked at her daughter's sad face and offered, "I could go get some? Safeway's two miles away. It'll just take fifteen minutes."

Callie looked to Sofia for approval, and the five-year-old nodded enthusiastically.

"Why don't we all go?" Callie asked. "Field trip!"

* * *

As it turned out, the "field trip" took more than fifteen minutes. And they ended up buying a lot more than just flour.

"Here, Sof," Callie handed her the gallon of milk. "You carry this. Mommy and I will get the rest of the bags."

Callie and Arizona set the grocery bags down on the counter, and Sofia came running around the corner of the kitchen island, swinging the milk directly into Arizona's left leg.

"OW!" Arizona yelped. "Sof, be careful! You just bruised my shin!" Arizona chided.

Callie, standing several feet away, looked down at Arizona's legs. "Which leg did she hit?" she asked curiously, somehow already knowing the answer.

"The left one," Arizona answered offhandedly, not even realizing what her words meant.

"The _left_ one?" Callie specified. "And you felt it?"

Arizona looked down, her eyes widening. She met Callie's eyes, a dazzling smile taking over her face. "I felt it!"

Callie grinned. The nerve reinnervation had worked. Arizona had feeling in something that no longer existed. In a leg that wasn't biologically hers.

All Callie wanted to do in that moment was wrap her arms around Arizona and kiss her with all the passion in the world, but she settled instead for leaning down and smooching Sofia on the head. "Good job, baby!"

"Sit down," Callie instructed, leading her ex-wife over to the couch.

Arizona, still in disbelief, allowed Callie to sit her down. The brunette sat beside her, so close that the blonde could feel the warmth of her leg.

Gingerly, Callie held up her hand. "I'm gonna put my hand on your leg. Tell me if you feel anything, okay?"

Arizona nodded, mentally preparing herself. Maybe, it was just a one-time thing and the reinnervation hadn't worked. She had to prepare herself for disappointment.

"Close your eyes," Callie whispered.

Arizona closed her eyes. She felt butterflies line her stomach. Suddenly, she was so nervous.

Callie—her body suddenly made of vibrating pins and needles—slowly brought her hand to the knee of her ex-wife's prosthesis, laying her hand flat on the device. She felt a chill run through her. And then, even though she knew it sounded crazy and wasn't possible, she felt the warmth of Arizona's skin.

Unconsciously, Arizona shivered. Even with closed eyes, she felt Callie's hand, a soothing salve, against her knee. She felt the warmth of her ex-wife's hand touching her leg. She felt the warmth all through her.

"You feel it, too, don't you?" Suddenly, Callie's breathing was shallow, realizing how close she was to Arizona. Realizing that they were touching. Almost.

"Yeah," Arizona whispered, languidly opening her eyes to stare into the clear brown ones inches away from her. "I feel it."

* * *

 **Leave reviews for a happy writer :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary:**

 **The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again.**

 **When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. When people are in pain, they sometimes go directly to the source of what hurt them, hoping that this time will be different.**

 **Hoping that they'll be stronger. Better. Smarter. Kinder.**

 **Better equipped to work through the pain and to be happy.**

 **Stronger to prevent the next injury.**

 **Sometimes, it's only wishful thinking.**

 **And, other times,** **it works.**

* * *

"You feel it, too, don't you?" Suddenly, Callie's breathing was shallow, realizing how close she was to Arizona. Realizing that they were touching. Almost.

"Yeah," Arizona whispered, languidly opening her eyes to stare into the clear brown ones inches away from her. "I feel it."

Callie wasn't sure if she had been asking about the prosthesis or about the almost tangible electricity between them. It was so acute that she could almost see the sparks running from her hand to Arizona's metallic thigh.

She wasn't sure what question Arizona had answered, either. Did she feel the connection, too?

Callie moved her hand up slightly, a little higher than her joint. Well, maybe more than _a little_ higher. "What about this?" she quietly intoned. Her voice sounded foreign, even to her own ears.

The fact that Arizona didn't even have to look to know that Callie's hand had moved to her thigh was absolutely surreal. It wasn't that the feeling was exactly the same as it would have been on her other leg—it definitely wasn't, but without a doubt, she could feel something soft and hot against her. And that, coupled with seeing _it_ , seeing Callie touching her, left her completely breathless.

When she didn't reply, Callie looked up at her in question.

"Yes," she finally croaked.

Callie smiled, attempting to regain a collected demeanor. "Well, good thing we're making pancakes, huh? They're not quite cake, but I think we deserve a celebratory breakfast."

Arizona pulled herself out of her trance. "Yeah. This is...this is one to celebrate," she smiled.

Callie grinned back.

"Good work, rock star," Arizona complimented.

The brunette blushed. "I couldn't have done it without you."

Sofia, who had been edging towards the living room, watched them curiously. "Sof!" Arizona called out, waving her over. "Come here. Let me show you something."

Sofia scampered towards her moms, sitting on the other side of Arizona.

Arizona wrapped an arm around her, explaining the exciting news as Callie looked on with a smile. After Sofia felt content that she'd experimented sufficiently with smacking, tickling, and rubbing her mom's prosthetic knee, Arizona leaned into her and whispered, "See? Mommy built this for me. I told you she's a superhero."

They looked at Callie and giggled conspiringly.

Callie chuckled. "I can't deal with your guys' inside jokes. I'm making pancakes."

"Chocolate chips, pwease!" Sofia requested.

Callie lifted her fist in approval as she walked back towards the kitchen. "Right on," she agreed.

As she washed her hands at the sink, Arizona caught her eye. Neither woman could stop smiling. "You're amazing," Arizona mouthed.

Though she wouldn't have thought it were possible, Callie smiled even harder.

* * *

"You're home!" Arizona greeted as Callie walked in, home from work a few nights later.

"Yeah," Callie stated, her voice monotone.

Arizona's face fell as she took in her ex-wife's troubled demeanor. "Are you hungry?"

Callie shook her head. "I'll sit with you two, though."

"Okay," Arizona nodded, attempting to read Callie's mood and expression. What had happened?

The three of them sat down for dinner—potatoes, chicken, and salad—and Sofia recounted her day as Callie picked at the tablecloth in silence.

Arizona kept looking over at her, wondering what might have happened. Had she done something wrong? Did Callie want her to move out? Had something happened with her girlfriend?

After dinner, Arizona sent Sofia up to her room while she did the dishes. Callie ghosted towards the couch, sitting down with a sigh.

It had been a rough day.

From the adjacent room, Arizona attempted to think of a way to ask her ex-wife what was wrong. She knew it wasn't her place, but she couldn't help that she loved Callie. She couldn't just watch her suffer.

Slowly, she made her way towards the couch and sat beside the wallowing woman.

"I have a question," Arizona warned.

"Shoot," Callie turned to her and immediately agreed. What did she have to lose?

In an attempt to distract Callie, she asked, "The prosthesis project...you first started it because of me?" Arizona kept her expression soft, gently prodding brown eyes for an honest response.

"Yes," Callie nodded, her expression shifting into one that was more neutral. "At first."

"Why?" Arizona asked. "I mean, I lost my leg, but why did you feel compelled to build a prosthesis?"

Callie bit her lip, thinking about how to find a balance in her response. She wanted to be honest, but she didn't want to overstep. She still didn't feel ready for Arizona to know how she felt. "I had a plan. I had a plan to save your leg. And I promised I would, even though I knew that there was a possibility I wouldn't be able to keep that promise."

Arizona looked down in regret. "I shouldn't have made you promise."

"No." Without thinking, Callie had brought her hand to Arizona's shoulder, not wanting her to feel guilty or responsible for even a second. "The whole thing was just so..." she shook her head. She still couldn't completely fathom what happened. How all her friends had been in a nearly fatal (fatal to some) plane crash. How it had killed her best friend. How it had, ultimately, ruined her marriage. How deeply the woman she loved had suffered because of it.

Arizona's eyes strayed to where Callie's hand had moved, and she felt her heart speed up. "Fine," she smiled softly, meeting her ex-wife's eyes. "Continue."

"I just...it's not that I felt responsible. Exactly. I knew that it wasn't my fault that we had to cut it off. We did everything we could. But you were so miserable. And I wished with all my heart that I could switch places with you, that I could give you my leg, but I couldn't. So I wanted to do at least the next best thing."

Arizona nodded, understanding where her ex-wife was coming from. "So you wanted to build me a new one."

"Right," Callie smiled kindly. "Which would sound totally crazy to anyone else. Building my wife a leg because she lost hers," she smirked, and she saw as Arizona's lips drew up into a smile, too. Then, she was silent for a moment as she took in her ex-wife's reactive expression and receptive demeanor.

Arizona felt herself blush with self-consciousness as Callie watched her in silence, looking at her with such sincerity that it almost hurt.

"You deserved to be happy," Callie continued, her voice small but decisive. "You deserved everything. And I wanted to give you everything."

Arizona felt her stomach dip and her heart swell. After the divorce, she'd realized how much Callie had truly loved her, but the verbal reminders of just how deep that love ran never ceased to leave her breathless.

Callie had loved her more than anyone else had ever been capable of. Perhaps, she had loved her more than anyone else _would_ ever be capable of.

They were made for each other and always would be, but Callie had a girlfriend and it wasn't Arizona's place. She didn't have the right to be honest with the brunette about her crazy, omnipresent feelings. Not anymore.

"Okay," Arizona accepted. "Thanks. I'll never be able to express how grateful I am for everything you did for me."

Callie waved her off. "We were married. It was a give-and-take relationship."

Arizona shook her head. "Not after the plane crash. I took _a lot_."

The blonde's set jaw told Callie not to argue, not to try to sugar-coat the truth that Arizona now knew, and so she didn't.

After a moment of silence, neither woman knowing how to continue, Arizona changed the subject, introducing the question she'd really been meaning to ask. "I have another question."

Callie eyed her carefully. Every time her ex-wife said that, she felt her stomach drop. Suddenly, she was very, very nervous. "Go for it."

Gently, almost regretfully, she asked, "What happened tonight? Did something go wrong with a patient?"

At that, Callie's stomach fell straight to the floor with a loud cacophonous _SPLAT_ , rancid guilt peppering the floor. Before she could stop them, her eyes welled up with tears. "Yeah," she breathed.

"Would it help to talk about it?" Arizona offered gently.

Callie shook her head, meekly murmuring, "She died on my table. I don't think anything would help."

Arizona boldly and unthinkingly moved closer to Callie. She felt a _need_ deep inside herself to comfort her ex-wife somehow. In any way that she could. "Could you have done anything to save her?"

Callie slowly nodded. "I could have worked faster. I _should_ have."

"How fast?" Arizona raised her eyebrows. She knew that Callie could be extremely self-critical and doubted that saving the woman would have even been possible. After all, the brunette was one of the best surgeons she knew. But she was also human. Sometimes, there were patients who you just couldn't save.

Callie's lips turned up into an almost sheepish smile. Arizona knew her well. "Too fast," she conceded. "Impossibly fast."

Arizona smiled back. "See? You did everything you could."

"Yeah," Callie breathed, still wishing that she could have done more.

Arizona searched her face. "I wish I could do something to help you feel better," she regretted.

"You are," Callie insisted. She carefully met the blonde's eyes. "This helps."

Arizona knit her eyebrows together. She wasn't doing anything. "What does?"

"You."

* * *

 **Just a quick update. I want to finish this thing before I leave for school on Sunday!**

 **Leave reviews please please please :)**


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary:**

 **The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again.**

 **When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. When people are in pain, they sometimes go directly to the source of what hurt them, hoping that this time will be different.**

 **Hoping that they'll be stronger. Better. Smarter. Kinder.**

 **Better equipped to work through the pain and to be happy.**

 **Stronger to prevent the next injury.**

 **Sometimes, it's only wishful thinking.**

 **And, other times,** **it works.**

* * *

 _Arizona searched her face. "I wish I could do something to help you feel better," she regretted._

 _"You are," Callie insisted. She carefully met the blonde's eyes. "This helps."_

 _Arizona knit her eyebrows together. She wasn't doing anything. "What does?"_

 _"You."_

"I'm glad," Arizona finally squawked after a long, meaningful moment passed between them. Her voice had left her body almost entirely, and she suddenly felt her eyes well up with hot, unexplained tears. She had gradually leaned in, so close that she could feel Callie's warm breath against her cheek.

As Callie felt her heart speed up at her unintentional, more-than-friendly slip, she made a point of slowing her suddenly labored breathing. Arizona's face was directly in front of hers. So close. She could hear her unsteady breathing.

She couldn't help but look down at soft pink lips, slowly and unconsciously leaning towards the blonde.

In turn, Arizona continued to close the distance. She ached for Callie. Her stomach hurt, her head throbbed, her eyes blurred with how much she wanted her.

As Callie leaned in, her arms ached with how much she wanted to wrap them around Arizona. Gently, her eyes fell closed, her heart taking off in her chest as she felt the blonde's warmth radiating off her. She felt her lips brush against Arizona's, and her heart stopped.

"I can't sleep," Sofia interrupted, suddenly standing several feet away from them with one arm clutching her teddy bear and the other towing her baby blanket behind her.

Callie and Arizona sprung away from one another as if they'd been electrocuted, the spell breaking and reality setting back in. Immediately, Callie jumped up from the couch and darted over to the little girl, picking her up and heading back towards her bedroom. She needed to bail before her self-control failed entirely. "I'll rub your back until you fall asleep, okay?"

Arizona, a statue seated on the edge of the couch, stood up and walked towards the guest room when she saw that Callie had the dilemma under control. She needed to escape the night.

What had she been thinking? Callie had a girlfriend, and even if she didn't, trying again—being together—was an insane idea. Sure, it had been three years, but that didn't mean that anything would be different if they gave their love another shot.

Still, as she attempted to fall asleep, all she could think of was Callie's lips against hers.

* * *

At six-thirty, Callie finally made her way towards her lab to work with Arizona. That morning, she had left before the blonde had even woken up, wanting to avoid any potential awkwardness. They had gotten too close to getting physical, and she didn't want to talk about what it meant. She wanted to go to bed. She wanted to forget how much she still loved her ex-wife.

By the time she swung open the door and walked inside, Arizona was already sitting down, waiting for her. "Hey," she smiled nervously.

"Hi," Callie replied, uncertainly walking towards her.

Arizona cleared her throat. Was Callie mad? Bravely, she asked, "Should we, um. Should we talk about last night?"

Callie froze.

"We don't have to," Arizona quickly assured her. "I just don't want things to be weird."

Callie shook her head. "Nothing's weird."

Arizona eyed her in disbelief. "Promise? Because...it feels weird."

Callie exhaled calmingly, insisting, "I promise." She sat down across from Arizona, rolling the chair towards her. "Let's just try something, okay?"

Arizona nodded, still not completely assured but willing to trust her ex-wife. "What are we trying?"

Callie smiled. "I want to see just how much you can feel with this thing. I'm going to ask you to close your eyes, and then I'll set different objects on your leg to see if you can feel the sensations: an ice cube, a pillow, warm water, a pencil, a piece of paper, a Coke can..."

Arizona raised her eyebrows. "You think I'll be able to feel all that?"

Callie shrugged, feeling hopeful. "Why don't we find out?"

Arizona nodded in consensus, closing her eyes to allow Callie to do her experiments.

Callie sighed, grateful to have Arizona's prodding eyes off her face, and grabbed one of the objects at her feet, placing it over the blonde's prosthetic leg.

"What do you feel?" Callie asked.

Arizona screwed her eyes tighter, concentrating. "Same temperature. Light-weight." She cringed. "I don't really feel anything." She opened her eyes.

"It's okay," Callie smiled, removing the piece of paper from her ex-wife's leg. "I probably wouldn't have been able to feel that, either."

Arizona smiled appreciatively, closing her eyes. "Let's try again."

"Okay," Callie breathed. This time, she carefully held an ice cube against Arizona's prosthesis. "What about now?"

The sensation was immediate. She felt something cold on her leg; she was sure of it. "Ice?"

"Yes!" Callie proudly exclaimed. "You got it!"

"Yay!" Arizona cheered. "Again."

They continued experimenting, and each time, Arizona could sense what the object was, able to feel its temperature and pressure.

"This is amazing!" Callie applauded. It was exhilarating. She couldn't believe her project was actually working.

Arizona laughed along with her. "It is," she agreed proudly. "You are," she shyly added.

Callie timidly met her eyes, the smile slowly fading from her face. "Thanks," she whispered.

Arizona placed her hand over Callie's arm and squeezed it. "Thank _you_ ," she countered. "You might not have been able to save my leg, but well," she blushed. "You saved me. And now you built this awesome thing. So thank you."

Somehow, Arizona's response seemed to have more meaning behind it than just a chaste, appreciative "thanks." And, inexplicably, her heart soared at hearing the blonde's words. Bashfully ducking her head, Callie declared, "You're welcome."

* * *

A few nights later, while the two women comfortably sat side-by-side on the couch, Arizona prompted. "You never did tell me how you met your girlfriend."

"At a bar," Callie responded simply, looking up from her Sudoku puzzle. "She said that I had pretty eyes."

Arizona smiled wistfully. "She was right about that."

Callie rolled her eyes slightly. "They're just brown," she griped.

Arizona's eyes widened. "Calliope, your eyes are not 'just brown.' Hasn't anyone ever told you that?"

Callie shrugged, confused and strangely self-conscious at Arizona's odd reaction. "Not really," she muttered.

"They're _magical_ ," Arizona insisted. As she said so, she couldn't help but get lost in Callie's endless orbs. They were the color of freshly brewed coffee, layered with copper and honey and the color of a redwood tree after a day of rain.

Callie's heart sped up as Arizona's cerulean blue eyes kept her gaze. "They're brown, but they're not _just_ brown," Arizona insisted. "They're beautiful."

Callie's breath caught in her throat, her entire body humming with glee. When was the last time she had been called beautiful and really felt it? Surely, not since Arizona. Arizona had always been the only one who'd known every piece of her and loved her despite everything.

For everything.

And, more than ever before, Callie felt the same unconditional love for Arizona. She was equally as amazed by her.

"You're one to talk," she argued lightly. "Your eyes are gorgeous."

Arizona shrugged coyly. She'd heard that her eyes were beautiful so often as a child that she had thought that " _bigbeautifulblueeyes_ " was one word.

"Wait!" Callie exclaimed.

Arizona laughed. "What?"

"What was your dream about?" Callie asked suddenly.

Arizona raised her eyebrows.

"I mean, it was how this all started, right?"

"Right," Arizona breathed.

"It was a good dream, right?" Callie joked.

Arizona nodded, a lost, longing look crossing her eyes. "It was sweet."

"What happened?" Callie pushed.

Arizona shrugged, suddenly embarrassed. "It was just us. Sleeping together."

Callie raised an eyebrow.

"Not like that," Arizona chuckled. "Literally sleeping. The way we used to. With you curled around me."

At Arizona's surprising and refreshing frankness, a warmth flowed through Callie's body at the memory of the feeling. That was perhaps what she had missed most about Arizona physically. It wasn't even the sex—though, god, she'd be crazy not to miss that.

But, more than sex even, she missed holding Arizona, falling asleep in each other's arms. She missed feeling as if their bodies morphed into one—never certain where her own ended and Arizona's began.

"That's it?" she asked softly.

Arizona nodded, her face flushing. "It just...you know, made me miss you. For a second," she added quickly. "Which is why I mentioned it."

Callie nodded in understanding. Then, she pushed, "Do you still miss it?"

Arizona's eyes widened. She knew that Callie would never physically or emotionally cheat on anyone, but the brunette's unfiltered question still made her nervous. "I miss a lot of things," Arizona replied neutrally, not specifying whether those "things" involved Callie. She didn't want to make her ex-wife uncomfortable.

Little did Arizona know, Callie wasn't uncomfortable. "Me, too," she admitted.

And, right then, she really, really, _really_ missed touching the blonde. In her lifetime, she'd rarely felt an "itch to touch." That overwhelming compulsion that couldn't be understood or explained until you felt the feeling run through your hands.

But with Arizona, she always felt that itch. Whenever she knew that she couldn't touch her, that she couldn't break through the barrier, she had always felt as if she might explode.

She could feel her hands shaking. They vibrated with how desperately they needed to reach out and touch Arizona. She balled up her fists at her sides and plastered on a smile, fighting the feeling. "So," she rasped. "Are you ready for me to show you off at the presentation? It's coming up."

Arizona dimpled at her, and Callie squeezed her hands more tightly, feeling them cramp from the pressure. God, she felt like she might combust.

"I'm ready," Arizona grinned. "All the rich, fancy donors are going to love it."

* * *

 **Okay, so I stole the whole "bigbeautifulblueeyes" thing from my mom. Apparently that was my thought as a kid! My eyes are almost as blue as JCap's, hehe :)**


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary:**

 **The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again.**

 **When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. When people are in pain, they sometimes go directly to the source of what hurt them, hoping that this time will be different.**

 **Hoping that they'll be stronger. Better. Smarter. Kinder.**

 **Better equipped to work through the pain and to be happy.**

 **Stronger to prevent the next injury.**

 **Sometimes, it's only wishful thinking.**

 **And, other times, it works.**

* * *

Arizona was having a tough night. Nothing bad had happened at work and nothing bad had happened at home, but still, she felt miserable. She felt as if every failure in her life had caught up with her in that exact moment. She felt overwhelmed with devastation over her life at that moment. Over the course of the last seven years, so much had changed. The person she was when she moved to Seattle would no longer be able to recognize who she was now. And that thought was hard to accept.

She just felt _down_. And so she'd been hiding away in the guest room for the past three hours. She just needed some time to feel sorry for herself. A moment not to feel thankful for all she'd gained, but instead sorry for all she'd lost.

Sometimes, she just needed give in to self-pity.

Finally, wiping her wet face, she headed towards the kitchen to get some water. It was late, Callie and Sofia were surely sleeping, and Arizona knew that the hour she'd allotted herself for sobbing had left her dehydrated.

But, lo and behold, Callie was sitting at the kitchen counter, drinking tea. Just her luck.

"Hi," Callie said softly, her eyes exploring Arizona's splotchy face.

Arizona looked away, hiding as she reached into the cupboard for a class. "Hi."

Callie was silent for a moment, just watching her ex-wife as she filled up her water class at the sink. She'd noticed that Arizona had been in a sour mood that evening, but she'd had no idea that she'd been in her room crying. The thought made her stomach hurt, and nervously, she asked, "Arizona, did I...do something wrong? Did I make you upset?"

"No!" Arizona's burning eyes shot up to meet Callie's in fervent disputation. Then, calming herself, she took a breath. "It has nothing to do with you. I promise."

Callie kept their eyes locked for a long moment, weighing Arizona's response. Then, she accepted it. "Okay. I trust you."

Arizona lips slowly rose into a grin. She knew that Callie hadn't carefully considered her words and that they were discussing a minor issue, but the fact that her ex-wife _trusted her_ gave her a sense of elation she hadn't experienced in a long time.

Arizona knew that she had committed several acts that had caused Callie's trust for her to wane. The blonde was so, so grateful to have regained it.

"It's just a weird day," Arizona admitted. "It's one of those days when everything just sucks."

Callie nodded slowly, empathizing, "Yeah. I get those."

Arizona smiled thankfully, and Callie melted at the sight of it. More than anything, she wished that she could comfort her ex-wife. She wished she could tuck Arizona's hair behind her ear, or brush her thumb over her lips, or just...be closer. She wished she could somehow take every ounce of pain Arizona had ever felt and shove it into her own heart. She would happily house both their hurt if it meant that the blonde could be happy.

Pulling herself out of her reverie, Callie patted the stool beside her. "Want to sit? Sucky days suck less when you're with other people who lo—like you," she quickly corrected herself.

"Are you going to tell me a joke?" Arizona teased, seemingly ignorant to the fact that Callie had almost just said that she "loved" her.

Callie threw her head back and laughed, recovering from her near slip. "You hate my jokes!"

Arizona smiled wider. God, she loved Callie's laugh. "I do," Arizona conceded. "They're awful." More thoughtfully, she added, "But thank you. For being here."

"This helps."

* * *

As soon as Arizona stumbled into the kitchen for breakfast at around 9:30 the next morning, Callie noticed an obvious limp in her step.

"What's wrong?" she asked immediately.

Arizona gingerly sat down on the couch, noticing sharp pain in her leg every time she walked. "Ouch."

Callie hurried over to sit beside her, and Arizona carefully removed the socket and prosthesis.

As Callie took in Arizona's stump, adorned with angry red lines caused by her tight socket, she inhaled an alarmed breath. "How did this happen?"

Arizona cringed, putting her hand over her face in embarrassed mortification. "It's not that uncomfortable, and it felt so real so...I tried to sleep with it on. The last few nights."

Callie raised her eyebrows. "How many nights?"

Arizona cringed. "Three."

It took all of her strength for Callie not to groan at her ex-wife's irresponsible choices. Arizona hadn't let her leg breathe in over three straight days? Really? Callie leaned the prosthesis against the edge of the couch and moved her fingers to ghost over the lines it had left on her pink thigh.

"I'm sorry," Arizona peeped, watching Callie carefully run her long fingers over her sore leg, so carefully and gingerly that her touch was far from platonically clinical.

Callie smiled up at her. "It's okay. I want you to be able to wear it for as long as you feel comfortable to, but we need to loosen the socket a little bit first, okay? I guess it was a little tight."

Arizona nodded, not wanting Callie to dwell on it or feel responsible somehow. "I'm just going to rest it for a bit. You can go run errands or do things or whatever. I'm fine."

Callie frowned. "No way you're getting off that easy. I'm going to grab you an ice pack to calm the swelling, and then we can just sit here or watch TV or something, okay?"

Arizona sighed, giving up on arguing for the time being.

Satisfied, Callie stood up and headed towards the freezer, grabbing an ice pack and then a clean dish towel to wrap around it and prevent a burn. She hurried back to the couch, sitting beside Arizona and handing her the ice.

"Thanks," Arizona breathed, immediately setting it over her thigh and wincing in pain.

Callie didn't miss her ex-wife's expression of pain and couldn't help but grimace herself. More than anything, she hated to see Arizona suffer. "Can I get you some ibuprofen?" she offered. "Some water? Are you hungry?"

Arizona couldn't help but smirk at Callie's overzealousness. It was cute, how protective her ex-wife still was. It was also unnecessary.

"Callie..." Arizona warned. Really, she was fine. Her leg just felt a little sore; it wasn't anything she hadn't experienced before.

Callie gave Arizona an equally testy look. "Come on," she pleaded. "I built the leg that hurt you. I feel a little responsible. Just let me take care of you."

Arizona bit her lip self-consciously, feeling her heart expand in her chest with the warmth of Callie's words.

"Pleeease?" Callie continued. "It would make me feel better." She missed being able to do everything she could to ensure that Arizona was safe and happy. It had always made her feel safer and happier, too.

"Fine," Arizona attempted to chuckle to soften the awkwardness and desire she suddenly felt, but it came out as more of a squeak.

Because, really, _she_ wanted to take care of Callie. Constantly. She wanted to still have that right. The right to wrap her arms around her ex-wife after a long day. The right to stroke her hair while watching a boring movie. The right to absentmindedly ghost her fingers over her curvy thigh.

But she couldn't. She didn't have that right. Not anymore.

Either Callie didn't notice the strange sound Arizona had made and her following intense gaze or she chose to ignore it. Instead, she picked up the remote and turned on the TV. She looked towards Arizona. "Any requests?"

Arizona shrugged. "Anything." She knew she wouldn't be able to watch much, anyway. Not with Callie so close. Not with her looking so beautiful.

In truth, Callie didn't care what they watched, either. She was just happy to bask in the presence of Arizona.

* * *

 **Hi all,**

 **I'm sorry for the super short update. I really just want to finish this before the semester starts on Monday! Expect another chapter either very late tonight or sometime tomorrow. Hopefully, I'll be able to post the ending on Sunday or Monday.**

 **Also! Guess who's seeing Brandi Carlile tonight?! Extremely excited.**

 **Hope everyone's doing well, and please leave a review if you get a chance :)**


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary:**

 **The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again.**

 **When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. When people are in pain, they sometimes go directly to the source of what hurt them, hoping that this time will be different.**

 **Hoping that they'll be stronger. Better. Smarter. Kinder.**

 **Better equipped to work through the pain and to be happy.**

 **Stronger to prevent the next injury.**

 **Sometimes, it's only wishful thinking.**

 **And, other times, it works.**

* * *

"Hey," Callie smiled as she walked into the lab. "How's the leg? Did you try it on?"

Arizona turned to her, clearly sporting the prosthetic leg. "So much better," she replied. "I didn't even realize that it was too tight before, but it's even more comfortable now."

"Good!" Callie chirped, pacing anxiously.

Arizona eyed her questioningly. "What's going on with you?"

And what could Callie say to that? _I'm oddly nervous in your presence? I'm in love with you? I kinda sorta want to try again, even though_ I know _it's a bad idea?_

Callie shrugged spastically. "Nothing. Just...getting nervous about this presentation."

Arizona raised her eyebrows, promising, "Callie, you have nothing to worry about. They are going to _love_ what you've done. I'm sure they'll donate millions."

Callie felt her stomach flip at the word "love." Which was crazy, she knew, but she couldn't help it.

"And," Arizona continued. "When you get nervous beforehand, because I know you will..."

Callie rolled her eyes, even knowing that it was true.

"Then I'll be there for you," Arizona finished, her dimples coming out in full force. "And, if you get nervous while you're in there, talking to everyone, just look at me. Pretend you're just talking to me."

Callie nodded, exhaling a relieved breath.

"I'm here for you. I always will be."

* * *

"What should we do tonight, Sof?" Arizona asked. It was rare that the three of them were all home with no work or school the next day.

"Yeah, Sof," Callie added. "You want to go out for ice cream? Or play Barbies together?"

Sofia adamantly shook her head. "I wanna go see _Inside Out_!"

Callie and Arizona turned to each other and shrugged. "Sure," Callie conceded. "Let's go!"

They decided to go to the movie theater that had always been their favorite. Rialto Cinemas was a small little hole-in-the-wall that only played two films at once, but it was a great place to go. It was unique in that, instead of standard movie theater seats, it had plushy, comfy chairs and couches for the audience to sit in.

"Alright, kiddo," Callie whispered as they walked through the blackness, searching for a seat. "It looks like it's a little crowded tonight, so Mommy and I need your help finding empty seats. Do you see anything?"

Sofia precociously scoured the crowded room until Arizona called out, "There's one!"

Quickly, the family made their way in that direction, only to discover that, indeed, there was only _one_ empty seat. And, sure, it was an oversized armchair, but it still wasn't big enough to fit all three of them without crowding.

Callie frowned. "You two can fit on there. I'll just go stand in the back and look for something else to open up."

Arizona rolled her eyes at her ex-wife. Was she being serious? There was no way she would ever let Callie stand.

She plopped into the chair and sat down Sofia on her lap. Then, she deliberately scooted over towards the armchair's right arm. She patted the space beside her, indicating for Callie to sit down.

Callie's eyes widened. "Are you sure?" she asked carefully. "It's going to be a little crowded."

Arizona smiled. "As long as you don't mind, then neither do I."

Callie most definitely _would not_ mind sitting so close to Arizona: their thighs kissing. Not wanting her ex-wife to think for even a second that the arrangement bothered her, she sat down in the empty space beside the blonde and their daughter.

She curved her shoulders, leaning forward and to her left slightly in order to try to conserve limited space.

"Are you okay?" Arizona worried. "Are you comfortable?" She leaned away from Callie as much as she could, trying to give her more space. But, even then, their shoulders and thighs were touching.

"I'm good," Callie assured her, her voice oddly high.

Arizona knit her eyebrows together, taking in the brunette's awkward positioning. Callie looked uncomfortable. Her shoulders were drawn up in an attempt to keep her arms from taking up so much room, but it was clear that she had no comfortable space for her right arm, with Arizona leaning back beside the back of the chair beside her.

Arizona knew a simple solution to the problem, and one they would have used without question when they had been together. Now, though, Callie was clearly choosing discomfort over additional physical contact—though they were already touching more of each other than they had in a long, long time.

"You can put your arm around me," Arizona offered, purposefully looking down at Sofia instead of meeting Callie's surprised eyes. "That is, you know. If you want to. Just if you think it might...be more comfortable."

And, contrary to what one may believe, she didn't make that offer selfishly. Sure, she physically _ached_ for Callie's arm around her, but the brunette had a girlfriend, and the two of them had failed before, and...

Normally, she would have never, ever suggested it.

But the truth was, Callie _did_ look uncomfortable. So whatever potential awkwardness or pain it would cause Arizona was worth Callie's comfort for the next hour and a half.

"Really?" Callie whispered. She cleared her throat. "I mean, it might be a little more comfortable..."

God, she wanted to touch more of Arizona. She wanted to touch _all_ of Arizona, in a somehow chaste way. She just missed their bodies pressed together in a warm hug. And, for the moment, sitting in the armchair beside the blonde was the closest she could get.

Arizona nodded, leaning forward slightly to encourage Callie to settle her arm over her shoulders.

When Callie carefully did so, holding her breath, Arizona hesitantly leaned back against her.

Callie suddenly felt as if her entire body was imploding, as if she was suffering from a heart attack with how rampart her heart ran, but she worked at keeping her cool. "This is better," she breathed.

Arizona couldn't help but grin up at her. "Good."

Finally, the movie began and Sofia cuddled up to her mothers. Unconsciously, Arizona leaned into Callie, and she felt all her agitation fade.

Sidled up against each other, Callie felt a sense of calmness run through her after the initial unrest faded.

She felt good.

* * *

"Hi," Callie welcomed the suited donors. "I'm Dr. Callie Torres, and today, I am going to present you all with how I have revolutionized prosthetics."

The donors raised their eyebrows—partially in disbelief and partially in wonder.

Callie anxiously looked towards Arizona, who was seated in the corner of the room, behind the donors' long conference table.

Arizona offered a reassuring smile and nod, urging Callie to continue.

Callie picked up a prosthetic leg from the table on her left, holding it up for her audience to see.

"As you know, I first worked with carbon fiber, then aluminum but found that both materials were too heavy to be as functional as they could be," she stated. "In order to reduce its weight, this limb is hollowed out, forming an exoskeleton. Over that, there is only a thin, skin-like layer to offer a sense of normalcy to the wearer. It can be customized with patterns of colors to suit the client, or it can imitate the color of their skin."

Arizona watched as the donors' eyes widened.

Callie looked towards Arizona again, then continued, "The finished model is 3D printed and titanium dust particles that are fused together using laser sintering. Because of the targeted muscle reinnervation—the surgery that involves rewiring electrical signals in the stump—the electrical signals that are going down to the missing limb are rerouted into residual muscles that are still there. So, now, when wearers of prostheses like these have a natural thought about moving that missing limb, they are able to contract that muscle, and we are able to capture those signals and translate them into messages for the prosthetic limb; essentially, we are able to redirect the nerves to the devices."

A man raised his hand, interrupting, "You suggested last time that you were able to make a man walk fairly naturally with your carbon fiber prosthesis, but do you have proof of someone actually having sensation in a missing limb?"

"Yes, I do," Callie answered immediately, resenting the interruption. She waved Arizona forward, and the blonde stood up and began walking towards the front of the room. She kept her eyes locked on Callie, not liking the watchful eyes trained on her every move.

Once Arizona was standing beside her at the front of the room, Callie introduced, "Dr. Arizona Robbins offered to be my guinea pig for this one."

"A guinea pig with one leg," Arizona muttered under her breath, and the audience chuckled.

Arizona turned back and dimpled at Callie, encouraging her to continue.

"In a short training period, Dr. Robbins was able to maneuver her leg just by thinking about the movement. After several weeks, she was able to feel sensations of solids, liquids, pressure, and changes in temperature."

At that point, the donors were clearly amazed, but Callie wasn't done yet.

She proceeded to demonstrate just how much Arizona could feel and just how much it acted as a normal leg.

At the end of the presentation, they were met with enthusiastic applause.

"Thanks," Callie blushed.

Arizona clapped along with them—harder than anyone else.

Callie shone at her. " _Thank you_ ," she whispered.

* * *

As the donors filed out of the room and towards the chief's office to figure out the logistics of donations towards Callie's cause, Arizona stood beside Callie at the door, shaking hands and ushering everyone out.

As soon as the last white collar walked outside, Callie shut the door, leaping into the air (as much as she could with heels) and letting out an almost maniacal laugh.

Arizona couldn't help but laugh along with her. "That went well!"

"It went _OUTSTANDINGLY_." Callie exclaimed, her shoulders dancing.

"It did," Arizona agreed. "You know why?" A sly smile crossed her face.

Callie looked at the blonde, her face softening in suddenly nervous anticipation. "Why?" she asked.

"Because _you_ ," she paused, just taking in the immeasurable inner and outer beauty that was Callie Torres, "are _outstanding_."

* * *

 **Okay, so I'm just now realizing that this story is mostly fluff. Despite the fact that they're not together. Which is probably boring! Conflict makes things interesting, right? I just like reading happy things, so...**

 **Who knows.**

 **I just figure we have enough unhappiness on the show as is. May as well have some happy stuff here!**

 **As always, thanks for reading. Update to come soon!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary:**

 **The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again.**

 **When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. When people are in pain, they sometimes go directly to the source of what hurt them, hoping that this time will be different.**

 **Hoping that they'll be stronger. Better. Smarter. Kinder.**

 **Better equipped to work through the pain and to be happy.**

 **Stronger to prevent the next injury.**

 **Sometimes, it's only wishful thinking.**

 **And, other times, it works.**

* * *

"That was amazing!" Arizona complimented once more as they left the hospital that evening and made their way home. A few nights before, they had agreed to let Sofia sleep over at Zola's, so it was only the two of them celebrating.

"It was," Callie agreed. "Webber said that one guy donated ten million. _Million_!" she repeated.

Arizona shook her head in wonder. "That's amazing, Callie. What are you going to do with all that money?"

Seriously, Callie replied, "Well, for starters, I need more than one 3-D printer."

Arizona nodded. "They're, what? Ten thousand dollars each?"

Callie nodded. "But, really, the money will give veterans access. In the end, these prostheses are cheaper than most on the market, but still. Some have PTSD and can't work. Ten million dollars means a lot of guys getting a prosthetic that they wouldn't have been able to otherwise."

Arizona smiled. She would never cease to be amazed by Callie's incredible _care_. Callie was so purely _good_. Her goodness had always attracted Arizona to her. How could it not?

"So, how should we celebrate?" Arizona asked. "Can I take you out to dinner? Make you dinner?" At her side, Arizona crossed her fingers, desperately hoping that Callie wasn't planning on "celebrating" with her girlfriend, instead.

Somehow, she felt that they should spend that night together. They'd spent months in the lab working on the leg and its usefulness, and Arizona felt just as excited about their success as Callie.

"We don't have to do anything that fancy," Callie argued. Going out to dinner felt too much like a date, anyway. She turned to Arizona. "Want to just cook together and watch a movie or something?"

Arizona shrugged, smiling, "Whatever you want."

* * *

Once they were home, showered, and changed into pajamas, Callie and Arizona finally got started on dinner.

"What should we make?" Arizona asked.

Callie knit her eyebrows together, thinking. "Pasta? Salad? Garlic bread? Does that sound okay to you?" She knew that Arizona loved garlic bread.

Arizona's eyes widened in appreciation. She loved garlic bread. "Yes!"

Callie chuckled. "Okay. I'll get started on the salad if you want to make the bread. You like _a lot_ of butter and garlic."

Arizona scrunched up her nose, but she didn't deny the accusation. Instead, she got started on chopping garlic, only thinking about how well the presentation had gone.

After Callie washed the lettuce and vegetables, she began preparing the salad beside Arizona.

They fell into a silence that would usually be considered comfortable, but for some reason, Callie felt on edge. She felt like something was missing. She felt incomplete, somehow.

Hollow. Empty. Her hands shook and her heart ached.

"Arizona?" Callie began tentatively after a moment.

"Callie?" Arizona joked back, looking up from the breadboard to meet her ex-wife's eyes. The humor faded from her face, however, when she noticed Callie's intense expression. "What is it?" she asked carefully.

Callie looked down, attempting to talk herself out of making the request. It was silly, she knew, but she felt powerless to stop herself. It was just something she needed. Something she'd needed for a long time.

Previously, she had been able to bury the need, knowing that trying to fight it was the right thing to do. And, in a way, it still seemed like the right thing to do. After all, they'd hurt each other so much before. They'd failed.

However, now, giving in felt right, too.

"Callie?" Arizona repeated, worry evident in her face. What was wrong? Was Callie going to ask her to leave? Was she going to marry her girlfriend? Was she going to say something Arizona didn't want to hear?

Callie exhaled an uneven breath, trying to steady her breathing and rapid heartbeat. She fiercely met Arizona's eyes, wanting to gauge any intricacies in her reaction. After one last steadying breath, she asked, "Can I...hug you?"

Arizona raised her eyebrows while her heart took off, suddenly erratic in her chest.

She remembered a conversation she had with April once about heart rate and how it could affect soldiers'—and, really, everyone's—behavior.

 _The White Zone_ was a heart rate below eighty beats per minute. It was when soldiers were on break. Resting. Arizona was definitely beyond that. She felt her blood pumping in her chest.

 _The Yellow Zone_ was a heart rate between eighty and one-hundred-and-fifteen beats per minute. It was when soldiers were on surveillance and ready for action. Still, Arizona's heart was beating faster. She could feel it in her ears.

 _The Red Zone_ was a heart rate of one-hundred-and-forty-five beats per minute or less. It was when soldiers were urgently responding to an emergency. It was the zone of soldiers in action.

One-hundred-and-forty-five beats per minute and over was the Grey Zone. Soldiers had a heart rate that high when responding to unusual or unexpected situations. She recalled that, with a heart rate in the Grey Zone, soldiers were known to lose fine motor skills, including loss of dexterity and complex decision making.

Arizona's heart was surely beating faster than one-hundred-and-forty-five beats per minute, because her feet felt glued to the floor, and she _knew_ that she was about to make a very irresponsible decision.

An irresponsible decision that she felt helpless to prevent.

It almost sounded like a sigh of relief when she finally exhaled, " _Yeah_."

Callie smiled nervously, immediately gravitating towards the blonde while Arizona shakily edged towards her, her body shuddering in anticipation.

For the entirety of their separation thus far, they had held strong, working to only make physical contact on very rare, passing occasions. It had been purposeful, it had been painful, and it had been necessary, because neither woman knew if they would have been able to stop themselves from going too far, if the opportunity were to arise.

Unfortunately, it had become harder and harder to hold back. It was wrong, they both knew, but it felt so _right_.

Being together. Being close to one another.

With no sound but their audible shallow breathing, Arizona brought her arms around Callie's back, as the brunette lifted her own to pull Arizona towards her.

Arizona felt her breathing slow as she pulled Callie against her, breathing her in.

God, she had ached for this. She had ached for this for so long.

Callie couldn't help but bury her nose into blonde hair. Her arms finally stopped aching from reaching out towards something—someone—who wasn't there.

They were around Arizona. They were where they belonged.

After a minute, Arizona pulled back, gazing into Callie's face with intense cerulean eyes.

As charged as the moment felt, Callie couldn't bring herself to look away. She couldn't move.

She watched as, slowly, Arizona's eyes settled on her lips, growing darker with desire.

Arizona wanted to kiss Callie. In that moment, she wanted to more than anything else.

Gingerly, she brought here hands towards Callie's face, her nimble fingers sweeping back black hair. She wanted to see all of her ex-wife. She wanted to know everything that she was. Everything she stood for. Everything she loved. She wanted all of it.

Callie's breath hitched. She felt as if she might combust. Slowly, almost fearfully, she brought her arms back around Arizona's back, prohibiting the blonde from changing her mind.

Not that she could. It was far too late for that. In that moment, nothing was on Arizona's mind except kissing Callie.

Not even their past. Not even Callie's girlfriend.

She lifted her face towards Callie's and then froze, close enough that both women could feel the breaths flowing from each other's mouths.

Finally, Callie closed the distance, leaning down and brushing Arizona's soft lips with her own.

Arizona hummed at the minimal contact, and Callie shivered at the vibrating sensation against her.

Immediately, the blonde's hands were active: cradling Callie's face and pulling her harder against her. Insisting on more contact. She pressed her lips to Callie's, suddenly desperate, and was amazed when she felt the brunette respond: plump lips moving against her own.

Callie felt on the brink of a sob with how much she was feeling. Her roller coaster emotions consumed her, coupled with the physical pleasure of kissing Arizona that eclipsed every other pleasure in the universe.

Finally, feeling the need to breathe, she pulled back. Her eyes never strayed from Arizona's face, and she watched bruised lips stilling and flushed cheeks turn white.

Arizona's eyes widened as she met Callie's eyes. What had she been _thinking_? _Callie has a girlfriend, she's not interested, and I just about_ assaulted _her_ , she thought in agony.

"Callie," she blanched in mortification, her hands falling from Callie's face as if she'd been burned. "I—I'm so sorry."

Callie shook her head, hoping to prevent Arizona's inevitable self-flagellation. "No. Don't be. It's fine."

"It's not!" Arizona choked. "I—I don't know what I was thinking. You have a girlfriend and..."

Callie swallowed hard. When was she supposed to tell Arizona the truth?: that she'd ended things with her girlfriend months before.

"I'm," Arizona shook her head, ashamed of herself. What had she been _thinking_? "I'm so sorry. I know we've moved on. It'll never happen again. Seriously."

"It's okay—" Callie tried again.

"No," Arizona interrupted, stepping back several feet. "I promise. It will never happen again. I've moved on. Really."

Though Callie had known that the kissing had been mutual a minute before, she couldn't help but feel hurt at Arizona's impassioned insistence that they were over.

"Can we just... _pretend it didn't happen_?" Arizona pleaded. "We'll just go back to making dinner and watching a movie and being ex-wives who get along?"

Callie's eyebrows shot up and her mouth dropped. Was Arizona serious?

"I mean," Arizona babbled. "It's a good idea. Your girlfriend doesn't have to know. It was my fault anyway."

"It wasn't just you," Callie argued, but her voice came out weakly.

Arizona sighed. Why was it all so hard? "Let's just have a nice night, okay? A nice, _friendly_ night. Let's just celebrate your victory." To encourage mutual cooperation, she turned back towards her cutting board, lifting the knife and dicing the garlic.

Callie's eyes widened as she eyed Arizona in disbelief, but the blonde refused to look up.

With a frustrated huff, she turned back towards her own cutting board beside Arizona. She began slicing the cucumber, and they fell back into silence. This time, however, it was much less comfortable.

Finally, Callie insisted, "It _did_ happen."

Arizona gulped in consternation. She continued to focus on the task at hand, standing strong while she fell apart inside. "I know."


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary:**

 **The human body is simple. When you break a bone, you get it set. When your appendix bursts, you get it removed. And then you modify. You adjust. You learn to avoid the danger, so you don't get hurt again.**

 **When it comes to people, on the other hand, it's not as simple. When their hearts break, when their hearts burst, there's no clear method to repair the damage. When people are in pain, they sometimes go directly to the source of what hurt them, hoping that this time will be different.**

 **Hoping that they'll be stronger. Better. Smarter. Kinder.**

 **Better equipped to work through the pain and to be happy.**

 **Stronger to prevent the next injury.**

 **Sometimes, it's only wishful thinking.**

 **And, other times, it works.**

* * *

 **Disclaimer: A few of these words belong to Antoine de Saint-Exupéry. However, I changed the context. I hope that won't upset anyone. Additionally, few of these words that I assign to him are, in fact, my own. For more information, feel free to Google it/message me. But, I'm just adding this little bit to avoid potential legal trouble. It really doesn't matter.**

* * *

 **Alright, y'all. Last chapter. I hope you like it.**

 **Oh! P.S! I've loved all your comments so far. It's the only payment we get for writing these stories, and though I do enjoy writing, I enjoy it much more when I know that someone else likes what I have to say, too! So, if you have a spare moment, please don't hesitate to leave a kind word. I cherish every comment. Truly.**

* * *

 _Finally, Callie insisted, "It_ _did_ _happen."_

 _Arizona gulped in consternation. She continued to focus on the task at hand, standing strong while she fell apart inside. "I know."_

* * *

They continued preparing dinner: Callie dressed the crisp salad, and Arizona took the warmed bread out of the oven and drained the pasta.

Arizona set two plates down on the dining room table and poured them each a glass of wine.

Silently, Callie watched her before finally helping by carrying over the food.

They simultaneously sat down across from each other, looking anywhere else. They served themselves and picked up their forks, still silent.

Despite her careful composure, Arizona didn't have an appetite. Not after what had just transpired. And not after realizing that she may have hurt Callie with her words. "It's not that I regret it," she began apologetically.

Callie looked up.

"I mean," she shook her head. She had no idea what to do. What to say. It was unfamiliar territory. "I don't know. Ignoring the fact that it's been three years and that you're dating someone, it's still not a good idea."

Callie waited.

"Right?" Arizona continued, looking for a crack in Callie's marble expression. "I hurt you so much. I know I did. I... _forgot_ how in love with you I was when we went into therapy. I don't know how, but...with everything, I did. And you knew it. And I can't imagine how that must have felt for you."

Callie swallowed. Hard.

It was true. When Arizona had talked about wanting a six month break, she had no longer wanted to be with Callie. It had been too hard. They had both bent, again and again, compromising what they needed for the other. Arizona had needed to find her self-worth again, and, well, Callie had needed to hold onto Arizona. In any way that she could. Which, at the time, had meant giving up her own desires and sanity.

In the end, though, Callie had realized that being happy together hadn't been possible. So she had said that she wanted them to be free, and Arizona hadn't stopped her; she hadn't argued. And, then, Callie had walked away, out of the office. And again, Arizona hadn't stopped her. Callie knew that, in her heart, Arizona hadn't _wanted_ to stop her.

"Awful," Callie rasped, her voice sounding foreign to her own ears. Because, as much as she resented it, Arizona was right. They'd hurt each other before, and they'd hurt each other again if they got back together. Why would they want to force themselves to go through that pain again? "It felt awful."

"I know," Arizona regretfully looked down at her plate. "So forgetting is easier. This was just a slip up. A tiny, miniscule, slightly small slip up. It happens between a lot of exes." Arizona knew that she would never be able to forget and that she would never be able to find someone to love the way she loved Callie, but it was the right thing to do.

What was the point of hoping that this time would be different?

Were they really any stronger? Any better? Any smarter? Any kinder?

Could it ever work?

Callie nodded, agreeing with Arizona's logic, even though it was agonizing. She wished that they could admit that it meant more than that, but was it really the right thing to do? After all they'd been through? After how much they'd hurt one another?

Why should they have hoped that this time would be any different?

"Okay," she conceded. "You're right. Let's just move forward."

* * *

By the next night, their lives and relationship had faded into somewhat of a sense of normalcy, though neither Callie nor Arizona had been able to think of anything but that kiss in their spare moments.

"Can we watch _Up_?" Sofia pleaded after dinner, immediately clearing her plate and hopping back to the table to grab more. She was hoping to butter up her moms a bit.

"Little Miss, you are becoming too big of a movie buff," Callie countered. "We need to start reading to you more or teaching you Mandarin or something."

"Hey, maybe she'll want to be a director!" Arizona defended. She turned her head towards Sofia, conspiring, "Right?"

Sofia nodded, grinning. "Right!"

Callie groaned in mock-exasperation. In truth, she loved how connected Sofia and Arizona were. Her ex-wife was such an incredible mom to their little girl, and Callie was beyond grateful for the partner with whom she'd chosen to parent; even despite their current conflict, she'd always be grateful for Arizona in that sense. Even _if_ she _did_ almost always take their daughter's side over hers.

"Fine," Callie surrendered. "But only because you already finished your homework and were so helpful with dinner tonight."

"Yay!" Sofia cheered, immediately racing towards the couch.

Callie chuckled and followed after her, sitting beside her on the couch. Arizona walked towards the TV to insert the DVD.

When Arizona turned around with the remote in hand, Callie quickly made room on the couch beside herself. But the blonde opted to sit in the adjacent chair, instead.

Even when they weren't touching, Callie always found comfort in Arizona's form sitting beside her. She yearned for it.

Therefore, she found herself feeling disappointed in her ex-wife's choice of seating.

Arizona, on the other hand, found herself feeling thankful that they no longer _only_ had the one couch, as they had several years before. She knew that being so painfully close to Callie over the course of the last few weeks had been hard. It'd been exhausting. It was so hard not to reach out and touch Callie. She'd always feel this insatiable compulsion to rest her hand on her ex-wife's leg. Or stroke her hair. Or grab her hand. And she knew that she couldn't.

She wanted physical contact so much that she couldn't think. Couldn't function. Couldn't focus on anything.

So, sitting beside Callie on their crowded couch was not a good idea. Especially not after the night before. That much Arizona knew.

As the movie began, Arizona still couldn't focus as she thought of Callie sitting several feet away. She wanted more with her. She wanted so much more. She wanted to be with her, and she wanted them to be a family. A real family. Not roommates who once loved each other, but wives. Wives who would love each other forever.

But they'd hurt each other so much before, so what was the point of trying again? And, as Arizona kept forgetting, _Callie had a girlfriend_. So there was no point to any of it.

From slightly behind her given the layout of the room, Callie kept her eyes focused on the back of Arizona's head. More than anything, she wanted to wrap her arms around the woman and kiss her and be honest about her feelings. She wanted to tell Arizona that she missed her, that she loved her, and that she wanted her, forever.

And she wanted to be brave enough to express those feelings, but they had _destroyed_ each other before. They had hurt each other, again and again. What if the time they'd spent apart hadn't changed anything? What if they'd go right back to causing each other immeasurable pain? Even while having the best intentions?

A part of Callie knew that they _had_ changed. That they'd matured. That they wouldn't hurt each other in the same ways again. That things would be different now.

But a bigger part of her was scared. And fear always won out.

* * *

Finally, after what felt like a lifetime, the credits began rolling.

"Okay, kiddo," Callie insisted, rubbing Sofia's back. "Let's get you to bed."

Sofia didn't answer and instead only curled up tighter, pretending to sleep so that her mom wouldn't make her move. She just wanted to sleep on the couch.

Callie looked up at Arizona, and they both rolled their eyes at their daughter's antics. Of course they knew that Sofia wasn't sleeping. She'd been hopping around only minutes before.

"If you're sleeping," Arizona began. She stood up from her chair and walked towards the little girl lying on the couch. "Then you won't feel me tickling you, right?" she teased, inching her hands towards Sofia's stomach.

Sof popped an eye open, screaming in both pleasure and dread as Arizona's fingers made contact with her skin. She convulsed and spazzed and broke into a fit of uncontrollable giggles. Callie joined in on the torture, and finally, unable to take any more, the little girl begged, "Stop!"

Callie grinned with prideful satisfaction, and Arizona plopped down on the other side of Sofia, soothingly running her hand through short black hair. "You still want to sleep?"

Sofia crossed her arms and shook her head defiantly, devising a plan to stay up even later. "No. Now I'm not tired."

"Is that so?" Callie smirked, knowing _that game_ well. Once upon a time, she had been the same with her parents and nannies. Something about being up past bedtime just felt exhilarating for a kid.

Arizona—always a pushover—thoughtfully offered, "Would it help you get tired if we read you a story?"

Sofia nodded excitedly, and Arizona's eyes flashed to Callie's, silently asking for her permission. "I'm sorry, Cal. I forgot that it's your night with her. I should've asked you if that's okay..."

Callie shook her head, waving off Arizona's apology. "It's not like we really have separate respective 'nights,' these days," she replied honestly. She saw the blonde visibly relax, and she turned to her mini-me. "Come on, Sof," Callie turned her back to her. "Hop on."

Scrambling onto her feet, Sofia stood up on the couch and put her arms around her mom's neck. She wrapped her legs around a soft waist as Callie stood up. "Should I...be an airplane?" Callie offered.

"NO!" Sofia immediately objected, with so much force that, several feet away, Arizona jumped in alarm.

"Okay..." Callie conceded apprehensively, wondering what had gotten into her daughter. "Should I be...a cheetah? A jetpack? A boat?"

"Cheetah!" Sofia decided.

"Yes, ma'am," Callie chuckled, galloping towards Sofia's room with Arizona following close behind.

Once they got there, Callie gingerly set the little girl down on her bed, moving to sit beside her. "Meow."

Sofia giggled. "That's not a cheetah sound!"

"Why not?" Callie pouted. "They're cats, right?"

Sofia shook her head. "They're cheetahs."

"Oh, yeah? What's a cheetah sound, then?" she challenged.

"RAWR!"

Callie laughed. Then, she eyed her daughter seriously. "What was that about, though, sweetie? When you said 'NO' to me being a plane?" she asked. "What's wrong with planes?"

Sofia frowned. "I hate them. They're scary."

"What happened?" Arizona knitted her eyebrows together, having missed part of the conversation.

Callie patted the space beside her on the bed, beckoning over her ex-wife. "Sofia says that she hates planes."

There was a stern look in her eye as Arizona eyed Sofia. She was all doe eyes and innocence, clutching her favorite teddy bear as tightly as she could. "Why do you hate planes?" the blonde asked patiently.

"They're bad," Sofia articulated. "A plane hurt you and Daddy."

"Sof," Callie argued. "It didn't—"

"No," Arizona interrupted, never taking her eyes off her little girl as she corrected Callie. "You're right, honey. Once, a plane did hurt Daddy and I."

Sofia nodded softly, thankful that her mother was valuing her concerns and not just lying to make her feel better.

"That can make them a little scary now, even to me, sometimes."

Sofia raised her eyebrows in shock. How could anything scare her brave mom?

Callie watched as Arizona laughed at their little girl's expression. The brunette reveled in the surprising spark and brightness that filled her blue eyes, even despite the devastating topic of conversation. A lot had changed in the past four years following the crash.

"I know," Arizona admitted. "It's weird when something scares your mom, huh?"

Sofia nodded, burrowing herself into Callie's side and leaning in to listen more closely. Callie absentmindedly rubbed her back, her eyes still fixed on Arizona.

"Planes can be scary because one really hurt Daddy and I once," Arizona continued. She looked into Callie's intense brown eyes. "And Mommy, too," she admitted.

Over the years, she'd learned how much the crash had taken from Callie. It had cost them _both_ their happiness together. It had cost them both their marriage. And it had cost Callie _her_ : Arizona herself. She had been unrecognizable for a long, long time. For a long, long time, the woman Callie had loved had disappeared.

As Arizona admitted that the plane crash had also affected Callie herself, the brunette felt a grateful and appreciative warmth flow through her. It was a poignant moment, but one she now knew she'd been waiting for for a long time. She lifted her hand into the air, fingers splayed, a silent invitation for Arizona to take it. A silent beacon of hope; an ounce of strength; a symbol of support. A token of their partnership.

Staring down at it, Arizona looked up at met Callie's eyes briefly, silently asking whether or not the brunette meant for her to take it.

Callie's lips turned up, and that was all the invitation Arizona needed. Without delay, ignoring the voice in her mind yelling "IT'S A BAD IDEA," she clasped her ex-wife's hand, gratefully entwining their fingers.

She exhaled in relief as she felt how perfectly their hands still fit together.

Callie felt her entire body relax and supportively squeezed it. Her thumb traced circles against Arizona's as the blonde continued, with a new sense of strength. "But _most_ planes aren't scary. Most planes don't crash. And Mommy and I are not going to let anything happen to you, okay? There's no reason to let planes scare you, because we will always be there to protect you."

Sofia slowly nodded, sticking her thumb in her mouth as she processed her mom's optimistic words. "But what if it hurts me?"

"Like it hurt me?" Arizona asked immediately, already knowing the answer.

Sofia nodded, her lower lip pouting out and her eyes wide.

Arizona shrugged, looking at Callie. "Then we'll have to get Mommy to build you a leg, too, huh?" she grinned. "Just like mine."

Sof's mouth fell open as she suddenly realized that being in a plane crash may not be the worst thing—at least not in her five-year-old mind. After all, her mom—the superhero herself— had said that the prosthesis could be any color the patient wanted. Even pink. No one she knew had a _pink leg_.

"So when we go on a plane someday to visit Grandma and Grandpa or Abuelo," Callie chimed in. "There's nothing to be scared of, okay? You'll just get to go super high; you'll get to go super fast, and you'll get to hold Mama's hand when it gets bumpy and scary for her."

This time, it was Arizona who gratefully squeezed Callie's hand. Callie met her eyes, and they shared a meaningful look of understanding.

Sofia nodded profusely, grateful for the responsibility of getting to take care of her mom and the relief that planes really weren't so bad. "Okay," she agreed.

"Okay," Callie smiled, glad to have gotten that conflict resolved. "Now, shall we finish reading _The Little Prince_?"

"Yeah!" Sofia exclaimed, scrambling off the bed to grab the book. As soon as she grabbed it, she climbed right onto the space between Callie and Arizona.

Regretfully, Callie pulled her hand out of Arizona's grasp as Sof handed her the book. "You want to read?" Callie offered the blonde.

Arizona shook her head. "I love hearing you do it," she smiled.

Callie blushed, remembering Arizona commenting something similar in therapy several years prior. She turned to the page where they had left off and began. As always, she made sure to act out the characters' voices and to show her audience all of the pictures.

Sofia and Arizona listened intently, feeling more content in that moment then they ever had before.

Finally, Callie reached the final page, concluding, "'Then, if a little man appears who laughs, who has golden hair, and who refuses to answer questions, you will know who he is. If this should happen, please comfort me. Send me word that he has come back.'" She paused. "The. End."

"More!" Sofia requested immediately.

Callie chuckled, turning the page to the acknowledgements. "That's all there is!"

"No," Sofia insisted, jabbing the text with her finger. "Read this."

Arizona made a face. "That stuff's boring, sweetie. It's not part of the story, and it's time for bed, anyway."

Sofia looked up at her with puppy dog eyes. "Please read it?" she tried once more. She rested her head on Arizona's chest. "I miss you when I go to bed."

Beside her, Callie wanted to groan at her daughter's blatant manipulation, but she couldn't bear saying no to someone so adorable. Even if it _was_ almost ten.

Arizona widened her eyes at Callie, mirroring her daughter's expression. She had never been to resist doting on Sofia, and now was no exception.

"Fine," Callie conceded as soon as she saw Arizona's similar hopeful expression. She looked at Sofia sternly. "But you're going to sleep as soon as I finish. Got it?"

"Got it," Sofia nodded solemnly, getting more comfortable against Arizona's chest. The blonde wrapped an arm around her daughter, her shoulder lightly brushing Callie's as she did so.

Both women tensed at the oddly comforting feeling. Then, unconsciously, they leaned closer to one another, allowing more of their clothing and skin to touch.

"'Acknowledgements,'" Callie began reading the 8th edition's final words.

After several pages of Antoine de Saint-Exupéry's old-fashioned prose, Callie recited his conclusion. "'Finally: Natalie, darling, you inspired me immensely throughout this process.'" Callie paused. "'And I know that, in fear, we said au revoir long ago, thinking that we would only bring each other pain, but I've modified my belief on that distinct topic.'" Callie silently read through the following words, pausing for long enough that Arizona looked up at her in question. Sofia, exhausted and lulled by her mother's voice, had fallen asleep several minutes before.

"What?" Arizona prompted curiously, noting Callie's obvious pause. She had already listened to the majority of the deceased author's acknowledgements, and at that point, she figured that she may as well listen until the very end.

"Nothing," Callie immediately replied. "Just..." she felt chills line her spine—her arms—her skin—as she read through the words. She was on the edge. On the edge of doing something risky. On the edge of doing something she had promised herself that she wouldn't do. On the edge of being honest with Arizona about how she felt.

Arizona leaned over Sofia, grabbing the book herself.

Callie inhaled the sweet scent of blonde hair, trying to reign herself in. Trying to remind herself to breathe.

Arizona found where Callie had left off and read them both the ending, softly reciting:

 _In all honesty:_ _Of course I'll hurt you. Of course you'll hurt me. Of course we will hurt each other. But this is the very condition of existence. To become spring means accepting the risk of winter. To become presence means accepting the risk of absence._

 _To be together means to hurt each other. But it means to love each other, too._

 _I pray that we will try again one day._

 _À bientôt,_

 _Antoine_

* * *

Callie and Arizona sat in silence after Arizona finished reading. They felt unable to look at each other or focus on anything else. The words ran through their minds on repeat, tugging at the resolve they'd both tried to hold onto for so long.

 _To be together means to hurt each other. But it means to love each other, too._

"Well," Arizona finally croaked, setting the book on the bookshelf and standing up. "We should probably tuck her in and get to bed."

"Right," Callie nodded absently. She felt like a ghost. She stood up and then moved Sofia's body towards the head of the bed, pulling the blankets up to her neck.

Arizona smiled easily at her daughter's peaceful, sleeping face. But she found that, unlike Sofia, she herself felt alarmingly tense and uneasy.

She walked towards the hallway and the guestroom with Callie's steps hauntingly echoing behind her.

"Wait..." Callie breathed before Arizona had the chance to hide inside. She felt inspired by the author's honest words, and she had to talk to her ex-wife before she lost her nerve once and for all.

"We should go to bed," Arizona once again attempted to walk towards her room, having to fight every cell in her body as she shut Callie down. She knew that she was doing the right thing by walking away. Callie had a girlfriend, they had hurt each other before, and Arizona did not want to sabotage her ex-wife's happiness. She loved her too much.

"Wait!" Callie repeated, more steadily this time. More desperately, too.

Hesitantly, the blonde turned back to face her, not quite meeting her eyes. After a long moment, she looked up and into the frightening intensity in Callie's rich chocolate orbs.

"'Of course we'll hurt each other,'" Callie restated, quoting the French writer.

Arizona shook her head. "No," she fought. "You can't—"

" _What_?" Callie exploded. "I can't...stop tiptoeing around my feelings? Stop lying to you?"

Arizona continued to shake her head, trying to keep herself from saying something she shouldn't. How could Callie not see how impossibly hard this was for her? How impossibly hard it had been: loving Callie but not being able to _show_ how she felt?

"What?" Callie repeated. "I can't tell you how I feel?"

"We _can't_ _go_ there!" Arizona insisted.

"Where?!" Callie argued.

Arizona groaned. "You have a girlfriend. A girlfriend who makes you happy. And so we can't talk about this, because it will change things between you and her. And it will damage your relationship with her. And I don't want to be the cause of your misery, again. I won't make it, knowing that I caused you pain again. I won't survive."

Callie stayed silent, not even moving as Arizona continued.

"Callie, I'm trying," she sighed. "I'm _really_ trying. I'm trying to do the right thing and to let you be happy. _I'm_ trying to be happy. I'm doing my best. But talking about this will mess up everything."

"Talking about _what_?" Callie asked, wanting to ensure that they were on the same page about whatever "this" was.

"I don't know," Arizona admitted. "Loving each other. Hurting each other. I don't want to say anything and mess things up between you and your gir—"

"You won't!" Callie interrupted before Arizona had even finished. Softly, delicately, she admitted, "We broke up."

Arizona's eyebrows just about reached her hairline. _What_ had Callie just said? They had broken up? _What_? " _Why_?" she asked, suddenly sympathetic to her ex-wife's loss. Had she been the cause of it? Had the girlfriend been jealous and dumped Callie because of it? Was it Arizona's fault for moving in and stirring the pot, or whatever?

But Callie didn't seem sad. She smiled slightly, admitting, "I realized that my relationship with her wasn't what I wanted. It wasn't what I needed."

Arizona's blood ran cold. The contents of her stomach eased their way towards her esophagus in knowing expectation. "What do you want?" she whispered, her voice betraying her sudden fear. She was afraid that she might fall over. Callie's reply would either save her or destroy her.

"What do _you_ want?" Callie countered, stepping closer to her.

Arizona released a shaky exhale. She swallowed hard. It had been a long time since she'd allowed herself to think about what she truly wanted.

She had buried her wants for so long. She had hoped that doing so would make everything easier.

It hadn't.

"I don't need you," she stated. Because she didn't need Callie. Not in the way she had before: the way she'd needed Callie only when her professional life got hard. "Not anymore."

"Oh," Callie breathed, her face falling and her eyes dropping to her feet. Had she read the signs wrong?

"But I want you," Arizona finished, ducking her head to meet Callie's first pained and then wide, relieved eyes.

"Calliope," she shook her head, as if unable to fully comprehend the feelings and thoughts that ran rampant within her. "I want everything that comes with wanting you. I want _everything_ _with_ you," she continued when the brunette finally met her eyes. "All of it. The good and the bad. I want it all," she breathed.

Callie shuddered, feeling her body hum with sudden energy. She felt like a kid on Christmas morning or like a spaceship on Mars. This is what she had been waiting for.

Arizona loved her. She wanted her. The way that she wanted Arizona.

"Okay."

Arizona's eyes widened, her heart booming off-beat in her chest. She had just taken a chance. She had just poured her heart out. What was _'okay'_ supposed to mean? "Okay...?" she questioned.

"Me, too," Callie declared, almost inaudibly. "I feel the same way. And I'm terrified of still wanting you. Because Antoine or whatever is right: we'll hurt each other again. There's no way to avoid it. So I'm terrified of wanting you again. But here I am, wanting you, anyway."

Arizona sucked in another shallow breath. She attempted to stay afloat as the shock of unexpected yet long-awaited words threatened to drown her. "When did you know? When did you...end things?"

Callie smiled as much as she could, admitting, "Two months after you moved in." In retrospect, she'd known sooner. Because she'd never questioned her love for Arizona, but she'd questioned Arizona's love for her. She'd had reason to question it.

But Callie knew now that Arizona had always loved her. She'd seen how deep that love flowed when the blonde had moved back in. She'd seen how deep that love flowed when they _really_ talked again after two-and-a-half years of individual healing.

And two months after Arizona had moved in, Callie had known that she didn't want to settle. She had know that she didn't want to be with anyone who couldn't make her feel at least a fraction as much as Arizona once had. She had known that she would have rather been alone than spend time and energy on someone she didn't completely connect with.

She had come to that realization months ago.

Months had since passed of Arizona silently agonizing about Callie and her girlfriend. She may not have been able to admit it at the time—even to herself. But Arizona had imagined them _together_ , and it had just about killed her. For months. _Months_.

And, discovering that the impossible had taken place: that Callie had loved her, that she _still_ loved her, and that she had ended a perfectly good, healthy, happy relationship with a perfectly nice woman to instead be with _her_ was overwhelming. She felt her eyes sting with unexplained tears.

"Arizona..." Callie breathed in sympathetic warning. She had always hated to see the woman she loved cry. It happened rarely, but when it did, it shattered her heart.

The sound of her name on Callie's lips would have been enough to send the blonde to her knees, but she held strong. She just shook her head and bit her lip as she fought back tears. She was a Robbins, after all. Her father had taught her to "soldier on." He had taught her not to cry.

To be a Good Man in the Storm.

She rarely cried. She hated to.

And Callie knew how rarely Arizona allowed herself to cry. She knew how the blonde had been taught to stand strong. So, though Callie hated seeing tears fall from blue eyes, she would never want to silence Arizona or stop her. Not when the blonde expressed vulnerability so rarely.

"It's okay. We're okay," Callie breathed. She held out her arms, signaling the blonde towards her. "Come here."

Despite the uncertainty of the situation, Arizona didn't hesitate before walking into Callie's waiting arms. She fell against her, wrapping her arms tightly around the taller woman's back. She allowed herself to finally, _finally_ , feel Callie's softness, inhale her scent, and detect her fast-moving heart beat against her own chest.

Callie wrapped her arms around Arizona, pulling their bodies tightly together. She felt the blonde's curves against her own and allowed her senses to overflow with every beautiful fiber of Arizona's being.

" _I love you_. And I don't ever want to hurt you again. I'm going to do my best not to. Even if it is inevitable," Arizona proclaimed into Callie's shoulder, the force of her words and the sincerity of her actions leaving no room for argument.

Callie had never in her life—never in a million years—been more thrilled to hear those words. "I know," she promised, kissing feathery blonde hair. "I love you, too. I'm _so_ in love with you." She pulled Arizona impossibly tighter against her, making up for lost time.

They stood there, holding each other up in the middle of the dark hallway until, finally, Arizona pulled back and dropped her arms. All she wanted was for Callie to hold her forever—to never let go—but she knew that it would be too much to ask for.

She didn't want to assume that this new revelation meant that they were automatically back where they left off. Well...perhaps not "back," because they left off in a place full of resentment, pain, and regret. But she didn't want to assume that Callie was satisfied that they could now be together, either, just because of what they'd said. She didn't want to be presumptuous, and she didn't want to push the brunette. Shakily, with a slight quiver in her voice, she saluted, "Well, goodnight."

Then, quickly, she turned away. She didn't want to look into Callie's face and read her biggest nightmare there—that she'd been right. That what they had just shared _had_ been meaningless. That it was closure. That, now, admitting that their love would always exist, they were done. Over. Forever. It had a nightmare she'd been living imagining for over three years.

So, as Arizona turned away and shuffled into the guestroom, she missed Callie's expression: a devastated longing replacing the former relieved elation in her eyes.

Callie silently watched as Arizona ducked inside and shut the door to the guest room, shattered and not knowing what else to do. Then, with a disappointed sigh, she headed towards her own bedroom. Towards the bed that had once been _theirs_ —the bed she'd hoped that they would share again that night.

She just wanted to hold Arizona forever. She never wanted to let her go.

But just when they'd finally been honest with one another—just when they'd finally made real progress—Arizona had pulled away. She'd hid. She'd bailed.

What had gone wrong? Why had there been such a sour ending to their sweet night?

As Callie got ready for bed, she tried to make sense of the blonde's unexpected behavior. They had just revealed to one another that they still loved each other. That they wanted to be together. And yet, Arizona had opted to sleep in the guest room instead of with Callie: where she belonged.

Callie laid in bed, wired and filled with pulsating fear and unexplained pain. Unable to sleep, she carefully considered everything she'd learned about Arizona throughout their long, hard, and ultimately beautiful relationship.

What was going on with her? Why had she turned away just when they had begun to make progress? Just when they had revealed that they still loved each other?

Callie recalled that, though immensely confident professionally, Arizona often was more cautious in her personal life. She was afraid of making hasty assumptions. She was afraid of loving _more_ , and of the heartbreak that often came with that.

Which was exactly why she had made the painful decision to sleep alone, Callie realized.

Decisively, the brunette pulled back the covers. She swung her legs off the bed and stood tall on the hardwood floor. She crept towards her doorway, then down the hall several paces to Arizona's door. With her ears ringing and her heart pounding in her chest, she pushed open the door. She caught sight of Arizona's limp form curled up on what had always been her side of the bed, facing the opposite wall.

Callie tiptoed towards the bed, climbing in and pulling the smooth blankets over her.

Arizona felt the bed dip and felt her heart throb in her chest with a sense of terror, surprise, expectation, and euphoria. She was scared to move. She was scared of uncertainty. She was scared of everything.

The sheets rustled as Callie edged towards her. The brunette placed a warm protective hand on Arizona's waist as she found a comfortable position, encasing the smaller body in her own.

Arizona whimpered at the contact. She finally exhaled a sigh of relief. One she felt as if she had been holding forever. _This_ was what she had yearned for for so long. "Calliope..."

Callie pulled Arizona tightly against her, wanting to feel the woman she'd ached for. She nuzzled her nose into the warm alabastrine nape of Arizona's neck, and the blonde entwined their fingers, needing to feel that additional connection. Needing to feel as much of Callie as she possibly could.

An incredible smile adorned Arizona's features, and she closed her eyes and buried herself in that blissful space between conscious and unconscious dreaming. Her mood was far brighter than it had been when she fearfully ducked into her room a few minutes before. Because, then, she still hadn't been sure where she and Callie stood. But now, Callie had given her an answer.

The right answer. One that let her know that everything would be okay.

That everything would be extraordinary.

"Goodnight," Arizona hummed again. She scooted back against Callie once more, and she felt her heart beat slow. The sound of Callie's slow, rhythmic breathing carried her towards comfort.

It reminded her that she was no longer on a topsy-turvy, unpredictable roller coaster. No.

She was home.

Callie felt her lips draw up into an easy smile. She softly kissed the smooth skin of the back of Arizona's neck, closing her eyes and inhaling the sugary scent of skin that felt like home.

"Sweet dreams."


End file.
